Chapter 06
Dean was having a panic attack.
That was clear by now.
Apart from the mental breakdowns I used to witness after Dean would have a nightmare about Charlie, I honestly had never seen him like this. He looked completely disoriented and frantic.
Luckily, I was familiar with panic attacks. Tommy used to suffer from them when he was younger and I watched my parents handle him enough times to know exactly what to do.
Dean and I had found ourselves on the floor of the bathroom, his back against the wall. I pulled away from the hug so that I could face him squarely.
Holding both his arms in each of my hands, I looked to him and said, "Breathe, in and out."
He tried to do as I told.
"Dean, look at me." I whispered calmly. "Look at me."
His ocean blue eyes met mine.
"Breathe." I instructed slowly. "In and out."
He was able to do it this time.
"In and out." I said again, my eyes searching his. "Come on."
He repeated the action but his body was still trembling.
I placed my palm on his chest, feeling the rapid pace of his heartbeat. I proceeded to rub up and down his chest in an attempt to calm him down.
"Deep breaths, come on." I reminded him because he seemed to have stopped.
Dean continued to breathe in and out as I rubbed up and down his chest.
"You're gonna be fine." I said soothingly. "Just keep breathing."
He did just as I told him to. And after what felt like hours, his body seemed to relax and the beat of his heart became normal. I could feel his chest heave up and down like he was trying to adjust to the calm pace everything was going now.
When I was sure his body had stopped trembling, I pulled my hand away from his chest and proceeded to sit beside him so that my back was resting on the wall too.
Dean had his arms on his knees and his face down in them. He just kept letting out breaths and nothing more. I simply sat there silent beside him, not really knowing what else to do.
My mind travelled to a thousand different places. I couldn't even comprehend what had happened or even think of any possible reason why it had. He seemed perfectly fine when I saw him earlier, he definitely didn't look like he'd be having a major panic attack in the men's bathroom less than an hour later.
The only thing I could think of that could make Dean act this way was his past trauma about Charlie and possibly fire. But then again, two and a half years had passed and I couldn't say I knew anything about Dean anymore.
A lot had changed.
This wasn't something I could simply guess.
"I'm sorry you had to see me like that." Dean's voice snapped me out of my thoughts.
His voice was hoarse and it was calm.
I shook my head, "Uh, it's okay."
Silence fell between us again.
But I broke it, "How are you feeling now?"
He finally lifted his head from his knees, fixing his gaze on mine, "Better. Thank you."
I nodded.
"Good thing you were here."
"What-" I hesitated at first but then I cleared my throat. "Uh, what happened?"
