Run To Me

And Breathe...

"What do I do, Tom?"

She might as well have asked him the meaning of life. He had no clue. This time, the answer was definitely not 42.

He gestured for her to come over, and she quickly crossed the room, coming to sit in his lap. He wrapped an arm around her and kissed the side of her head softly.

"What I would do is sleep on it. This is a big decision. You want to take your time. If you decide to open it, there is no going back. You can never un-read whatever is written. That might be good, that might be bad, only reading will give you that answer. If you decide not to...." he paused, and she looked at him, suddenly knowing.

"If I dont do it today, I can still do it another day. When I feel more ready. When I can accept whatever it tells me."

"Yes, exactly. I knew you'd come to that conclusion. So, I think, did James. He was a clever man, Molly. And he loved you very, very much."

"I know." Her voice was small and sad, but she didn't cry. For once, she didn't cry.

"Now, since I'm here nice and early for a change, how would you like to go out for dinner?" He smiled and squeezed her tightly. "I have a little surprise for you, and I'd like it to start with a lovely relaxed meal. What do you say?" He put a finger under her chin and tipped it so she met his gaze.

For a moment, she paused, could she really bring herself... no. Wait. James had told her himself, life was for living. And she would. Starting right now.

"Ok," she smiled and kissed him quickly on the lips, "give me ten minutes to change and put a face on." She jumped up and almost scampered away to get ready.

Tom grinned and shook his head. Any doubt he was doing the right thing evaporated with her glowing smile.

They ended up in a lovely Chinese restaurant that floated on the canal, not far from Tom's house. Well, at least that's what he'd told her. She'd never been to his. In all their comings and goings, it had all centred around her house. Two reasons, really, one she felt safe and comforted in familiar surroundings and two, well to put it bluntly, publicity.

Tom was who he was. There was no escaping that. Any time he moved, there was the chance of being papped. It was something she'd gotten used to very quickly. The thing was, being seen in the park, spotted at a restaurant, or even just shopping, was bad enough. Press speculation was rife but usually short-lived. Should she be seen going into or emerging from Chez Hiddleston? Well, goodness only knew where that would end up!

Now, as they ate their meal and watched the swans gliding up and down outside, she put down her chopsticks and took a sip of wine. Swallowing slowly, carefully, she looked at Tom.

"This is lovely Tom, I can't thank you enough for everything you've done for me. I will never be able to repay you. You know if there is ever anything I can do..." she smiled and looked at her hand on the glass. So small, so very, very small.

Tom shook his head, "I haven't even started yet, love." He put down his own chopsticks and wiped his mouth carefully with a corner of his napkin.
"I have something for you... here." He pushed a large white envelope towards her, and she looked at him with curious eyes.

"What is it?" She asked a little onviously, and Tom raised an amused eyebrow.

"Open it and see. " he grinned, and she slid it towards her. This time, there was no trepidation. She ripped the paper of the envelope, but nothing could have prepared her for what was inside.

Shaking, she pulled out the contents. Onto the table came a small phrase book, a miniature gladiator and a little red white and green flag. Molly stared. Then she stared at Tom. Then she started to cry. This time, though, the tears were of happiness.

"Oh.my.God.," she breathed. "Rome?"

"Yes, darling. I know you've always wanted to go back. Now we are. For three days. I wish it could be longer, but I have to do some press work. I wanted you to go now when you needed it so badly. Not have to wait."

She squealed with excitement. Oh Tommmmmm!" She hugged him tightly, then stood up. When do we go?"

"Tomorrow love, is that ok?"

"Very ok. Very VERY ok." She kissed him tenderly. "Thank you, darling." Now he shook his head.

"Nothing to thank me for, love. I'm just living up to my promise."

"Your promise?" She had half an idea what that meant, but she was too scared to really believe it.

"I promised James I would look after you. In the hospital..."

"The manstuff." She said quietly. "Did he know, do you think? That he wouldn't.. you know... make it?" She almost whispered.

Tom looked at her. His head told him to tell the truth. His heart told him to lie and protect her. He did a little of both.

"Well, they do say we all know when its our time. I suppose he might have been just making sure I was worthy of you."

She smiled and nodded, "Sounds like James. Did... did he manage to say anything at all?"

Now, Tom had no doubt what he should do.

"Just mumbles, but I know he was saying he loved you."

He lied.

It worked, and she smiled. She need never know. James hadn't said anything. Just looked and smiled and nodded as Tom asked his permission. Permission that would be held for another time and another place.

For now, he just wanted to make her smile. Give her a chance to relax. Give her a chance to heal.

"Shall we get the bill? I think we ought to go home and pack, don't you?" He smiled and gestured to the waiter.

A few minutes later, they stood outside in the evening air. It was warm, the air was still, and the sounds of the city made a background hum that, if it had stopped, they would actually have missed.

"Why don't you stay at mine tonight?" She said shyly, threading her fingers through his and looking up at him. "I'll go home myself now, and you could get a taxi to me when you're done. At least that way, you wouldn't be pestered. "

He smiled down at her "Darling that is such a sweet idea. Are you sure you want me to?"

She nodded. "I really want you to." She said in a quiet, firm voice. She'd never wanted anything or anyone so much in her entire life as she did at that moment.

"In that case," he lifted his hand and drew hers along with it. Kissing it softly, he repeated, "In THAT case, I think it only fair that you wait for me.
Escort me to your fair abode. I think, no, I know, it's time you visited me, dont you think?"

"What if a pap, anyone, sees us? Wont that be a headache for you and Luke?" She looked worried, and he shook his head.

"It would only be a problem if I wanted to hide you. It would only be a problem if I didn't want anyone to know I love you. But I do, and it's not. It never will be darling. It never will be." As if to prove his point, in full view of the stunned restaurant patrons, he swept her into his arms and kissed her.

Her mind raced, and her heart pounded. This was real. This was all real. Tom was willing to go public. For her. What could be better?

She was about to find out.