Run To Me

A Bump in the Road

The sun hadn't yet risen when Molly was standing in the kitchen sipping her tea. She looked out and could just about see the pale fingers making their way over the horizon - or where the horizon would be if she didn't live in a concrete jungle.  She was lucky though, she mused, as she watched the sky turn.  Lucky that she had a park to run in, and a wonderful man to run with.  That wonderful man was still asleep in her bed.  Where he had spent the last few nights.  Tom had kept his word, he'd stayed with her and helped her adjust to a new world.

A new world where she was finally free.  Of fear of the past, of worry about the future, of letting James down by not living her best life.  And oh boy, with one exception, was she living her best life!  Tom Hiddleston lay in her bed, Tom Hiddleston lay in her heart and best of all?  She was in his.  

Actually, she was wrong.

About the in her bed bit at least.  A pair of strong arms wrapped themselves around her and a warm pair of lips attached themselves to her cheek. "Morning darling" the sleepy, husky voice said softly in her ear.  She smiled and turned within his grasp.

"Morning handsome." she kissed him as she put her cup on the worktop. "you're up early?"

"I might say the same about you.  Are you ok love?" he looked at her softly, his still sleepy face framed with bed hair.  She smiled and raked her fingers through it gently, and he closed his eyes and smiled, "thank you kitten." he murmured.

"I'm ok Tom, I just couldn't sleep.  Maybe it's just this feeling that I've been treading water for so long and now?  Now I get to swim. As far and as fast as I want to."

"Not away?" he said with a sorrowful look, suddenly afraid.

"No darling, not away from you.  Never away from you." she kissed him softly. "I love you"

"And I love you Molly, more than I ever imagined was possible to love someone. Thank you."

"Thank you?" she looked at him puzzled.

"You have shown me that love is an ever expanding concept.  Just when you think you have reached your capacity to love, for your heart to hold and give love, it moves the goalposts and ta-dah...." he smiled. "I will never run out of room to love you darling." he kissed her deeply and, as dawn fully broke over the rooftops around them, he carried her back to bed to show her.

A couple of hours later, they were both regretting the early start - not the return to bed of course -  as they trudged their way along their training route.  They still had several months, but it was a real slog.  For Molly especially. This was the black spot in her otherwise spotless existence. Where she used to almost enjoy running, now every step, every jolt reminded her of James and what she'd lost.

Coming to a narrow section along the canal, they jogged on the spot to let some cyclists through first.  Molly stopped.  She paused her watch and then turned to Tom.

"I'm done."

"For today love?  That's ok." he smiled and stopped too, resting one hands on his hip as he breathed heavily, raking his other hand through his hair. 

"No, for good.  I can't do... this. " she made a gesture to indicate the whole running thing.  Tom looked at her and smiled knowingly.  

"Come on kitten. time you and I had a little talk." He'd expected this at some point.  Actually earlier. "I've something to tell you." they walked on, hand in hand, stopping at an old converted warehouse area that now contained shops of all kinds including some of their favourite cafes.  "Let's sit here." he indicated a table and she sat while he disappeared inside.  Re-emerging a few minutes later, he carried two mugs of tea.  Hot and strong and as she discovered when she sipped it carefully, sweet.

"Sugar?  I don't take..."

Tom held up his hand " believe me, you need it.  I can see in your eyes and the colour of your face, you're in need." 

She didn't argue, she did feel weak.  Weak and tired and done.  "So," she said, sipping more of the tea, feeling it seep into her and refresh her tired soul. "What do you want to tell me?  Should I be worried?" she wasn't really but all the same...

"No.  Not for a moment." he grasped her small hand in his. "You think you can't do this, don't you.  That it's too much, too long, too hard, too painful. Every step reminds you of what you lost.  Every footfall tells you he's not here any more.  That it's 26miles too long, that it's months and months of training and you might not even finish." he looked at her intently.  She nodded, feeling tears begin to prickle at the back of her eyes.

"I miss him Tom. I miss him and me.  I love you, you know that, but.." she looked down at the table.

"I'm not your brother." he squeezed her hand "and that's something for which I am eternally grateful." he grinned as she looked up.

"Hey!" she started to say and he half stood, reaching over the table to kiss her.  Sitting back down her said, 

"Because THAT would just be so very wrong!" She smiled, her cheeks flushed as they always did when he kissed her so cutely, "Darling" he continued,  "this is hard for you on so many levels, emotionally, physically and well, I just want you to switch off.  There is nothing you can't do.  Nothing you can't achieve - well maybe not reach the top shelf of Tesco's but we all have our burdens..." he smirked and she slapped his arm playfully. "Seriously though Molly, you CAN do this.  For Me, for James, and most importantly, for YOU." he paused a minute and took a swallow of tea.

"Sugar in it IS pretty rank, I'll grant you that" he laughed "but ANYWAY,  think of it like this...  Run the first part with your head," he said, "the middle part with your personality, and the last part with your heart."

For a moment, she looked at him.  He never failed to surprise her, never failed to make her feel good about herself, never failed to make her feel she was living her best life. "thank you." was all she said and stood up. "Ok, let's leave this rank tea here and head back.  We can start again tomorrow."

Tom stood and came round to hug her, "Now THAT'S my little kitten, right there.  Welcome back!" he smiled "Come on, last one back has to do the dishes for a week!" he called as he jogged off.

"Hey not fair Hiddleston!" she ran after him "you can beat me just by walking back!" she whined in a little girl voice. "I'm telling!" 

"Have to catch me first!" he called and ran off laughing.  She shook her head and laughed as she jogged after him. James may be gone, but she still had an overgrown kid in her life.  Thank God.