the bad couple

chapter 30

Mrs Edwards walked to my door and knocked gently before entering, she entered with a sympathetic smile holding flowers and chocolates.
"hey leia, how are you?" she asked taking the same seat... He, sat in.
"I'm pretty shooken by it" I confessed looking down.
"I'm so sorry, i had no idea he would do anything like that, i don't even know how he got a gun" it always confused me, the way people apologised and then justified why it happened.
"it's not your fault, no one knew he had it" I say quietly.
"are you in pain?"
"no, the doctors gave me some pretty powerful painkillers" but they didn't help with the pain that the loss of, him, brought when he left, without a fight.
"they said as long as you take the painkillers there isn't any point on you staying here, you can be discharged now, unless you fell anything else, are you hurting anywhere else?" she asks worriedly.
"no, can you sign me out? And take me home?" I ask.
"yes, will callum be able to look after you?" she asks, hearing his name hurt, it hurt more than the pain my dad could ever cause.
"no, he's busy" i lie not wanting to talk about it.
"honey, I'm sure he's not too busy to look after you" she says warmly.
"well he is, I'll be able to look after myself please just take me home" I say harsher than intended.
"ok, if your sure" she says going to talk to the doctor, i check my phone, nothing, why would he text? Or call? He doesn't care, he says he loved you but he left without a fight, forget him, forget dad, forget mum, forget everyone, they all caused me pain, they were meant to help but they made it worse.

Mrs Edwards came in a little while later.
"here, put these on, do you need help?" she asks.
"no, I'll manage" i say emotionless.
"ok, if you change your mind, I'll be right here" she says kindly, i wince inwards when my feet touch the floor, I make sure she doesn't notice, i use my crutches to hobble to the bathroom, i ignore her hand and close the bathroom door, i awkwardly get changed and exit to find her sitting relaxed on the seat.
"ready?" she asks looking at me in my green workout shorts and tight white tank top.
"yeah" I hobble out and wait for her to unlock the car before I climb in.
"so, what happened with you and callum?" she asks once we start driving.
"what?" I ask ignoring the stinging in my chest.
"i know somethings up, he wouldn't leave you to look after yourself like this, what happened?" I sigh and decide i need to talk to someone.
"he's had family problems too, as you know, so I helped him with it, he agreed that he would help me with my dad, but he ditched me and made me go alone, he wouldn't answer my calls and after I woke up he told me that his mum had told him that I told her that he visited his dad, i told him to leave because I couldn't trust him... And he did, he left without even fighting for me" I say wiping the fresh tears away.
"sweetie, I'm so sorry, are you ok?" she asks, ofcourse I'm fucking not, the love if my life, only man that I ever truly loved has left me.
"I'm fine" I say convincingly.
"ok, if your sure" she sighs, she pulls up outside the apartment building and i thank her before awkwardly making my way in and opening the door to my apartment.
"alone again, naturally" i say to myself and flop on the couch, I'm so sick of this, of my life, how did it get so bad? Am I just doomed to have a bad life and let everyone who ruined it get away with it? I have never done anything but yet i was abused, neglected, abandoned, even abused in some foster homes, cheated on by my boyfriend, let down by the live of my life, hurt by my dad, again and then have the live of my life give up so easily, this is the end, I'm not doing it anymore, i cant get revenge in my dad, because he's dead but mark and... Him, can't get away without feeling even a little but if the pain i felt when they ruined me, they thought i was bad before but I was just getting started.

I get a cab to marks apartment checking i have my hammer in my bag, the driver tries to make conversation but I don't communicate with her properly, we pull up and after I pay her i find marks car, it's dark now, so no one will see me, i smash his windshield, windows, doors, trunk and bonnet, the alarm goes off but no one comes out, he must be busy, i get a second cab to... His house, i know his mum and siblings are away for the weekend so I can tell him this alone.
We pulp up and the pain increases when I see his house, so many memories, mostly bad, we're made her and now even more will be.