the bad couple

chapter 46

Callums POV

After leias nightmare i go to my own room but I cant sleep, I'm so worried about her, i cant even imagine what she went through with her parents and even when shes away from them, they still haunt her, she deserves so much better, i want to be there for her, tell her she can trust me, but she's scared, we need to go slow i know how hard it is for her to think about everything that's happened to her and if I'm continuously trying to get her back, she'll feel pressured, i need to let her know in there for her, always, if i help her through everything that's happened, maybe when shes feeling better she'll realise that she can trust me, i need her, i love her so much, i go to the balcony in an effort to clear my head and after a while I hear her go out to hers, i look over but she doesn't see me, i don't know how, when shes near me i feel different, soon i hear her break down into sobs but before I can go comfort her kyle walks out, i like kyle, I'm not jealous of him or anything, i know they're friends and that he can be trusted, he doesn't like her that way and he knows I love her so he wouldn't try anything.
"leia?" I hear him say.
"sorry I didn't mean to wake you" she says sadly wiping her eyes, he takes a seat beside her.
"you didn't... Come here" he says opening his arms and allowing him to hold her securely in his arms.
"it's ok Leia" he says petting her smooth shiny hair as she cries into his shoulder, after a while they reposition so there both sitting Indian style looking out at the sky.
"do you want to talk about it?" he asks after a while.
"no" she says quickly, it's obvious she's uncomfortable talking about that dream.
"okay, i won't push you into it" he says softly making sure she's ok.
"thank you" she says gratefully.

After a while she speaks again.
"thank you kyle" she says quietly.
"for what?" he asks in surprise.
"for being such an amazing best friend"
"this is how you friend zone me?" he jokes and she let's out a light giggle, that I love.
"seriously though, thank you" she says gratefully.
"your welcome, you deserve the best of best friends and the best person to make you happy, like callum" he adds in and i cant help but listen to their conversation.
"i want to trust him, but I cant" she says, so does that mean she wants to be with me?
"you called out for him, when you were sleeping" he tells her.
"i know, i love him kyle, but I cant trust him, i don't think I'll ever be able to fully trust someone and i cant be with someone I cant trust" it breaks my heart to know what I've done to her.
"do you think it would be easier to trust him if you were with him?" no, she needs to trust me first, i need to worm and make it up to her before I can be with her, it's the least I can do, it's what she deserves.
"i don't know, after everything, I don't see how I'm meant to trust again" i hate myself for what I've done to her, she liked mark but she loves me and I've let her down.
"he is good for you, the way he looks at you, and you him, it's obvious you two share something special, he makes you happy, happier than I've ever seen you" is it that obvious that she is everything to me?
"but he hurt me" them words physically pain me reminding me of what I did.
"he regrets that, alot, we were talking about it and it's obvious it kills him to know what he did, he would spend a lifetime making it up to you"
"should i give him a chance?" no, let me prove you can trust me first.
"you should, he makes you happy"
"thank you" i rest my head in my hands, this isn't right, i don't deserve to be forgiven straight away, i need to work, to make it up to her, i soon hear the bells and decide to get ready for class, but I cant concentrate on what I'm doing, i try to make coffee with baked beans, but stop before I do anything properly.
"dude, you ok?" kyle asks grabbing for a mug to make his own coffee.
"yeah, fine" I say.
"how's leia?" I ask as he goes to turn away.
"shes better, i talked to her last night and she might give you a chance" he says happily.
"thanks" i mutter not looking at him.
"whats wrong?"
"nothing"
"obviously somethings up, what is it?"
"I just didn't get any other sleep last night"
"you could probably take today off, just say your sick"
"no, I'm ok"
"if your sure" he says sitting on the sofa drinking his coffee, i know it seems like I'm mad at him but I'm not, I'm just in a bad mood now because I do want to be with leia, but I want her to trust me first, i don't want her to feel pressured.
"hey" leia says coming downstairs and filling a mug with coffee.
"morning" i mumble and go to sit with kyle on the sofa to watch whatever he's watching.
"whats wrong with you?" leia asks sitting beside me.
"nothing" i say simply taking another gulp of coffee.
"really?" she asks raising an eyebrow.
"really" i repeat.
"sure" she says slowly, i roll my eyes at her and stand up to get ready for class.
"one sec" kyle says and stands up, following me, i pretend not to notice as I climb the stairs to get my bag.
"hey callum, whats really going on?" he asks as he follows me into my room.
"nothing" i say as I try to side step him out of the room.
"tell me or get out of here by the window" he threatens.
"fine" I say and turn for the window, he grabs my arm pulling me back.
"callum, just tell me" he pushes.
"nothing, but because you don't believe me, i have to go through the window" i say going for the window.
"callum tell me"
"fine" I sigh and sit down on the bed preparing to tell him.