Miyuki was making small sounds. It was so empty in here, the large space of Charlotte's theater like a cavern, swallowing everything up. I was staring at my knees, not having moved from this position for a long time. Having had to tell everyone about Yuko, shaking in my words. No one had really moved, and it had been a while.
I'd run in here, having seen it from Yuko's. Crying too hard. If Ayane had seen me, she'd have asked invasive questions. She'd known Yuko for a lot longer than I had. Seeing her like that? Breaking down? I couldn't handle it. Guessing at her memories, everything now gone.
Yuko's great-niece had been talking about the neighborhood from when she'd grown up. How French Cup had once been a little music store. What other shops had been here? We'd moved in their places, but Yuko remained. Not even leaving after her husband passed away. Determined to keep going. What had it been like? What had we moved in on? What were her great-niece's memories?
It made me think of the hotel. How it had moved in, and as some of our shops fell in the past three years, businesses like it had moved in. Everything was changing.
What would move into Yuko's shop?
The thought was unbearable. My hands went over my face again, finally moving. My forearms descended to my knees as I curled over, too devastated to even cry. Staring into my hands. Trying to think of a future, but not being able to see one. A nothingness like my numbness. All of it too much. Finally, my breaking point.
She was gone now, but not really gone. She'd be living with a happy family. She'd smile at those children that she got to see every day. Her great-niece had been right, there weren't any children in the neighborhood for her. Every day, she'd talk about the children she'd sell her sweets to, the ones who'd come to her shop. But, none ever did anymore. Her low prices...they hadn't been her under-valuing herself. Not really. She'd wanted to sell them for prices that children could afford, and if they couldn't afford it she wanted to give it to them for free. Her humbleness, I always went against it. Trying to get her candy to real hands. Her fantasy, of being able to serve children again. Well, she'd be serving two children again. Children who were her family, and loved her.
"I can't believe this," Miyuki whispered, one more in so many countless times. This thing she kept repeating. It was what all of us felt, but she was able to say it out loud.
Behind me, Hanako was sitting there. Nikki was close by, on another couch. Miyuki was sitting near Hanako. We'd been like this, gathering together over these past days. But, today was different. This finality. This definite consequence of disaster.
Yuko's shop would not be opening again. That's what her great-niece had said without saying. Yuko would never, ever come back. She was from Mie prefecture, so far away. Even though we could visit, was it our place? From what her great-niece had been saying about our neighborhood, that it was dangerous now... By extension, did that mean we were dangerous? Had we brought danger here, somehow? She'd said she wouldn't raise her children here. To think, that the average person thought that about our neighborhood?
I knew I couldn't go over to Mie prefecture. I'd never go. That was her life now, and she'd be happy there. I wasn't a part of that. I wouldn't be a part of her life ever again.
There kept being brief thoughts about having played a part in this. That this had come from French Cup. But, I couldn't bear to think about that. A mental block.
She'd loved this neighborhood. She'd loved all of us. Bringing us sweets, talking to me every day. Being so happy to see us. She'd even recently made friends with Gyeong-Wan, and he'd taken care of her best of all.
Gyeong-Wan... I wanted to see him. Something in me was angry, this tiny ball. Among all the numbness, there was still that anger that I'd been feeling for the past couple of days. Knowing he was in the hotel right now. Yuko's great-niece had been talking about danger, but the only danger that there was had been brought by the hotel. Those boys had come from there. Other guests had threatened us with bad reviews online, coming in and yelling at us. Making people scared.
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French Cup: A Neighborhood Story
DragosteSummary: In Tokyo, a neighborhood is seeing the tail lights of its local industry fading into the distance. Gentrification is moving in, replacing secretly LGBTQ owned shops and restaurants that have populated the block for decades. New developers a...