Achromatic Adventure

Xaun

After our intense but loving squabble, Seren and I parted ways for the night. Seren and Artemis had a routine that they hardly ever broke during the week; Artemis would put their favorite fluffy blankets in the dryer for 10 minutes, Seren would order take out for everyone and do the dishes, then the two of them would snuggle underneath their toasty warm blankets in front of the two big televisions we had in the living room while they played video games. Artemis and Seren were almost always inseparable except for when it came to video games. Seren was always an independent person who valued her alone time as well as her personal space, even though she let Artemis in more than she ever had any other partner, she still preferred to game on her own. Together but separate. That was the best description for their relationship as well as their favorite past time. Snuggling in between cutscenes and caressing one another's hands as they waited for Seren's virtual crops to be ready for harvest. The two of them were adorable, in sync, and equally sickening. 

As Seren and Artemis carried out their ritual, I spent my time in my room. My safe place. I was never much of a decorator before, but since moving in with Seren and Artemis at the start of the school year, I finally started to blossom. My room has become a safe haven and the perfect place for me to relax and decompress after the day no matter what kind of day it had been. Not to be dramatic, but when i walked through the door of my room, i felt like i was taking off my armor. I felt like i could breathe. I felt like i was everything i wanted to be and everything i am all at once, unapologetically. And i loved everything about it. 

Hearing Seren and Artemis giggle and joke amongst themselves from down the hall was like music to my ears. I snuggled under my duvet comforter and listened to the music as i began to daydream. Within minutes, i was plucked out of the pictures dancing in my head by the sound of my phone vibrating. I had a message from Xaun. Let me tell you about Xaun, he was such a complicated person. He meant so much to me, and yet being around him felt like getting too close to a flame every time we spent time with one another. I knew that i loved him. I wasn't sure what that love meant or what I wanted to do about it. But i knew he was someone special to me that I wanted to cherish forever. Simultaneously, he was more dangerous than getting close to a flame could ever be. He was a cold blooded killer, one look into his piercing blue eyes could stop my heart in its tracks. He was the definition of outcast. And he loved that fact. Seren never approved, but then again she had no good reason to. But, just like always, I saw something in him that made his rough exterior seem softer when we were alone. At times, it felt like his knives were just part of a children's playset. Nothing dangerous at all. Just there to give him comfort and make him feel in control. Something to make him feel important when nothing else could. Which was ironic, because for the duration of his time in my life, he was so very important to me. 

"Bro, why have you been MIA all day? How was class?" Xaun really had a way with words, as you can tell. Not too much, not too little. He typed like an emotionally stunted frat boy that still lived with his parents and drove daddy's Rolls Royce everywhere. Thank God that wasn't who he was. Doesn't excuse the nails on the chalkboard i could hear in my head every time i read the word "bro" at the beginning or at the end of every sentence he spoke or message he typed. He used the word like generic seasoning salt in an average home when there were no other seasonings available for the meats, he sprinkled it everywhere. I personally always felt like it was a coping mechanism. Something he used to put a wall between himself and whoever he was speaking to. In the case of Lilura vs. Xaun, I don't feel as though the wall stayed in place very long. But, I have been wrong before. 

"My classes for the day went by pretty quickly, I spent most of the evening in the library afterwards before hanging out with Seren and Artemis. How are you?" I smiled at my phone as i watched the little dots dance while he formulated his reply. I never knew how to feel when i told him about meetings or lack there of with other guys. Sometimes he seemed supportive, and other times he almost seemed to leak venom through his teeth as he smiled and give me encouragement. I decided not to mention being stood up just yet.