AITA (Fanfic writes)

Am I the asshole for giving my wife a taste of her own medicine?

(Bella x stepsibling)

I, 28 male, recently got married to Renee, 38 female, who has a daughter, Bella 17 female.

I had a child, Alexis 11 female/male/enby, from my previous marriage with Natalie who died from cancer when Alexis was 8. Alexis was diagnosed with autism at age 1 when Natalie and I noticed some unusual behavior.

Alexis has bad communication skills and primarily uses sign language to communicate. Their senses are extremely sensitive and they hates loud noises, bright lights/colors, and rough/hot textures.

They also have ADHD which makes it difficult for them to learn.

They were previously in regular school where they made D's and F's in P. E., Math, and Science and just made C's in Language Arts, Art, and History. I switched them to special education in hopes of getting their better grades and boosting their confidence.

It actually worked and Alexis pulled their grades up and now make A's in Language Arts, Art, and History and B's in Math and Science. Their P. E. grade is their lowest at a C, but that's okay because their still passing.

This however is unsatisfactory to Renee.

When we had first started dating there was a rule in place that we wouldn't parent each other's children. If the other parent's child broke a rule or came home with bad grades then the biological parent would handle it and the stepparent would stand aside.

After we got married, Renee was under the assumption that the rule was irrelevant because of the marriage. Neither Renee nor I adopted each other's children nor do they refer to us as parents.

Renee, however, thinks that Alexis should address her as mom and follow her rules. The only argument we have gotten into since getting married is Renee's treatment of Alexis.

Renee claims that she's just being a mom to them, and when I point out the different treatment between Alexis and Bella she brushes it off and says that Alexis needs more discipline because they're an unruly child that has me wrapped around their little finger.

I remind her that Alexis's little quirks that she claims is 'bad behavior' is caused by their autism. Renee insists that the autism is fake and that their doing it for attention because "They don't look autistic."

To further explain the differences in treatment between both children;

1). On weekdays Bella's curfew is 11:30 while Alexis's is not allowed to go hang out with their friends at the Special Ed Center. On weekends Bella has no curfew and Alexis's curfew is 6:30.

2). Bella is allowed to eat whatever she wants whenever, while Alexis has to ask permission to eat or drink anything unless it's water and they aren't allowed to eat and sugar or junk food.

3). Bella gets taken out shopping and always gets the newest and most expensive items while Alexis is lucky to get Bella's hand me downs or something from the dollar tree/thrift store.

4). Every time Alexis bring home a report card it's crumbled up and thrown away with a "Do better" comment. Whereas whenever Bella brings home a report card it's given high praise and pinned onto the fridge.

Renee's daughter Bella on average gets F's in Math, Science, History, Languages, and P. E. and only makes C's in Biology (the only science class that she passes) and Language Arts.

I works full time and travel across the state while Renee is a stay at home parent. This means that she spends the majority of her time with the kids, so I haven't gotten to see this behavior until I got a three month vacation before being sent to the other side of the country for work.

The passed two months I've noticed Renee's unfair behavior and downright mistreatment of Alexis. Bella also copies Renee and bullies Alexis and refers to Alexis as 'Retard' and 'Ugly moron' and a few other names that I won't list here.

Everything came to a head however, when last week Alexis brought home their report card.

As per usual and happily showed Renee how she brought their B in science up to an A. Alexis mutely clapped their hands and bounced with their knees with a wide smile on their face as a showed how happy they were.

That was destroyed when Renee snapped out "Stop that! You look stupid!" Renee then pointed out how their B in math was down by two points (it was still a B, but a B- not B+) and proceeded to lecture them by saying;

"I can't believe that you really think that this is acceptable! It's already bad enough that you embarrass your father and I with your retarded behavior in public, but now you're slipping up in school?! If you don't stop this nonsense and straighten up then your father and I will have no choice but to send you away, am I clear?"

Because Renee yelled and Alexis hates yelling and conflict, they ran to their room crying. I unloaded on Renee and demanded that she apologize to Alexis. Renee refused and said that they need to learn.

I slept on the couch for the following week until it was Bella's turn to bring home her report card and I decided that it was time to give them a taste of their own medicine. When Bella showed us her F and C average I unloaded on her;

"I can't believe that you really think that this is acceptable! It's already bad enough that you embarrass your mother and I with your deplorable behavior in public, but now you're slipping up in school?! If you don't stop this nonsense and straighten up then your mother and I will have no choice but to send you away, am I clear?"

Bella, whose never been scolded or yelled at started crying in front of us while Renee screamed at me "What the fuck is wrong with you?!" To which I responded "It doesn't feel good, does it?"

Renee is now staying at a hotel and refuses to return until I apologize to Bella. I refused and said that I only quoted her and said the exact same things to Bella that she did to Alexis. I asked her "Why is Bella so special that she isn't allowed to be talked to the same way that Alexis is?" Renee didn't answer me.

I've started the proceedings for a divorce because I refused to be with someone who would treat my child as anything less than a human being.

But before I sign the papers, I just want to be sure that I didn't go too far.....

and would I be that asshole for cutting off Renee's card, that she's using to pay for the hotel and everything right now, that I pay for and is in my name?