Suffering, Silenced ~[A Tokio Hotel Story]~

A Break |3

It felt like I was running forever before I finally reached our spot. My shoes were muddy as I ran through a vast field to eventually reach an overgrown gazebo where I can see Daria waiting for me.

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Her long brunette hair glittered in the sunlight, behind that, her blue eyes glisten softly.. It was a while since I've last seen her. I breathe in the fresh air, feeling so relieved and safe; finally for once. The breeze sweeps along my scarred skin making me wince slightly, but it felt comforting somehow. I sighed softly before taking a seat next to Daria. She gives me a hug, takes my bag and places it onto the ground, smiling. I look towards the sky as the sun begins to set; admiring the colours appearing slowly.

"The sky looks beautiful, doesn't it?" I say eventually, "Daria I'm so lucky to have someone like you. I might of not hinted that out but I just wanted to let you know.."

Daria looks up to me and I can see her look at me sorrowfully. I have told this girl everything, I trust her with all my life. I don't know how I would survive without her... She's like an angel. Although she helps me so much... It just doesn't seem enough to stop all the thoughts. And I wouldn't do it because it would shatter Daria... I don't want her to feel what I feel. She deserves the world. I stay alive just because of her at this point.

"Hey... Kristina. I know it's hard for you ever since you know... your... mom." Daria pauses for a second, "But I promise I will always stay by your side."

Daria lifts her hand and places it onto mine. She closes her fingers and reveals only her pinky.

"Promise we will be here for each over? Always?" She whispers

I stare at the gesture for a moment. Thinking about how I would no longer be in pain if I just ended it all. But then on the other hand... I would be selfish for bringing the burden onto Daria. I could never bring myself to do that. Never. But-

"Kristina?"
"Oh.. sorry. I was just daydreaming.." I answer abruptly.

I bring out the pinky of my finger and we interlock our pinkies.

"I promise", We both say in sync.

I stared into Daria's eyes before moving my gaze towards her phone. There were some headphones attached.

"What are you listening to?" I question curiously

"Oh, just a song by Tokio Hotel!!" She replies excitedly, "Wanna share one headphone and listen girl??"

"Oh yeah sure...!" I responded hesitantly before taking one of the headphones handed by Daria.

I placed the headphone in my ear and immediately a melody I recognise started playing. I realise that this is the same song that played on the tv! My eyes felt like they were lighting up from the tune. A sense of ecstasy overrides my body as the singer sings "Don't Jump". I can hear the passion in his voice as he sings each line. They understood how I feel. The song was like therapy to my mind and felt like it was curing me bit by bit. As the music blares in my ears I look up again to admire the sunset slowly turning itself into dusk. The leaves crunched and blew across the wooden floor of the gazebo before escaping into the forest embedded in the field. It seemed like my bad thoughts were escaping along with them. I took a deep breath and let out a small smile before looking at Daria, who was also lost in the moment of the melody. I remembered how good it felt to be happy and have not a care in this shit hole of an earth. I am just so grateful to finally have a break from everything and have a temporary happiness. Even if it was temporary, it is more than what I would ever ask for. I finally feel somewhat free.