Suffering, Silenced ~[A Tokio Hotel Story]~

Embarrassment |20

I was fast asleep and was dreaming. I was dreaming about the bad scenarios, all replaying in my head. It almost felt like something was beside me...

I opened my eyes slowly, seeing a sort of dark blue colour. I looked up and almost choked on my breath, I was caught by surprise.

"Sleep well?" Tom says, smirking putting his hands behind his head and leaning against the bed board.

I went red, I was so embarrassed. Why did I think that I wouldn't get caught here? It's literally their room! Oh god... I'm so incredibly stupid, how was I going to explain this?...

"It doesn't bother me, don't worry." Tom assures me,  still giving me that annoying smirk.

"Sorry... I don't know how to explain this." I say, completely flustered and red, immediately getting off the bed.

"Oh... you're leaving? Where are you going?" Tom questions, slightly sitting up to look at me.

"My roo-" I reply, before realising, "Has Daria came back yet from breakfast?"

"You weren't asleep for that long, they are still all in the cafe, Daria's probably down there eating or talking." Tom giggles to himself, whispering to me, "Or making out..."

I force a smile and laugh, "Oh yeah haha!" Inside it slightly hurt... "I guess I won't interrupt..."

"That's fine, you can stay here whenever you want or need." He smiles.

"Oh and by the way, why are you up here? Are you not going to stay there with the others?" I inquire.

"Oh yeah... I was planning on just getting my phone to listen to some music down there, because the conversations are usually Bill and Daria talking away." Tom says, leaning besides him to grab his cellphone that was on the night table. "I guess I can stay here a little longer."

I can feel myself going red again... God this was so embarrassing. But I decide to make the most out of it...

I go over to him and sit next to Tom and the bed. I lean to see his phone, playing some sort of music.

"What are you listening to?" I say, looking at him.

"Oh just The Smiths.." He replies slightly hesitantly.

"I love The Smiths!" I smile as I see him go slightly red and rub his head.

"I'm sorry?.." Tom says, starting to smile and become a bit flustered.

"I said I love The Smiths!" I laugh, "You have good taste in music."

"You actually like The Smiths?" He replies bashfully.

"Yeah!" I beamed, grinning at him whilst he smiles to himself and looks down.

"You also have good taste..." Tom said warmly.

He gave me a headphone and the song "There Is a Light That Never Goes Out" played. The song felt so comforting to me, I felt like me and Tom might have more in common than I expected. The song was nostalgic to me, but I only played it when I felt like I wasn't safe; which was quite common. The music bonded us together, just like theirs. The band's music lead me here in the first place and I was so grateful. But then the butterfly effect got to me... What if Daria never discovered them and texted me about them... What if that song didn't play on the tv? What if Daria never got tickets? If these wouldn't have happened, nothing would have happened. I would've still been rotting away in my room, listening to music, slowly dying.