Just the way you are- Leah Williamson

Wow

Elena's pov
After 2 hours of talking she said she had to go now
Elena: "yeah...can I have your number or something?"
Jayme: "already missing me mmh?..."
Elena: "Maybe...."
She wrote me her number on a piece of paper and gave it to me
Elena:,,Bye Jayme...it was an honor to talk to you"
Jayme: "Mrs. Rodriguez for me too"
I just had to smile and she turned and left
I stood there for half a minute and had to smile to myself, then I took my drink and went back to my girls
Elena: "wow..."
Beth: "Are you friends now?"
Katie: "I honestly thought you were taking her home"
Viv: "How was she?"
Elena: "She was just...wow, haven't felt that in ages"
Viv: "wait a minute you fell in love"
Elena: "I honestly don't know"
Leah: "You've only known her for 3 hours"
Elena: "She's so...how should I put it, different from the others"
Beth: "Why different?"
Elena: "She wanted to get to know me...me as Elena and not as Elena the soccer player"
Leah: "Get over it, I'm sure there were others who felt that about you"
Elena: "But I've never felt that way about anyone"
Beth: "Nahhh I'm not so sure"
I known about who beth talked about
Elena: "Beth, she doesn't want me, we can't force people to choose us"
Beth: "And what if she does want you?"
I just sat still, what if leah wants me?
I'm glad that Leah doesn't know that I used to be in love with her because otherwise the conversation would be a bit uncomfortable
Elena: "Then it would be like this"
Beth: "do you still have feelings?"
Kind of awkward next to Leah, surreptitiously speaking of Leah
Elena: "don't do this, it's not fair"
Beth: "It's not fair that you still have feelings for her?"
Elena:,,it's not fair to remind me every time... it's not like it took me 5 years to get over it so please...please...stop reminding me"
Why is Leah looking at me like she's feeling guilty or something
Beth: "But it's also not fair to fuck other girls while thinking about someone else."
Elena:,,Beth...should I say it in slowmo? She...don't...want...me...it took me 5 years to realize"
Leah:,, and what if she does want you?"
Elena: "Shut up you don't even know who I'm talking about"
she looked at her glass and something is extremely weird here
Elena: "What's going on here?"
Katie: "We may or may not have told Leah who you're talking about"
Elena: "Wait but if Leah knew it's..."
Leah: "Me..."
I was shocked and disappointed at the same time
Elena:,, wow I have to figure that out first"
Leah: "Is it that bad that I know?"
Elena: "No but... I wanted to tell you"
Leah: "Can we talk about this somewhere else"
Elena: "I honestly don't want to"
Leah: "Please I just want to know why"
Elena: "If it's that important to you, we can go out for a moment"
Leah: "yeah"
we walked out together and stood outside
Elena: "soooo"
Leah: "Why didn't you tell me?"
Elena: "why should i tell you when i know you'll never feel the same it's like telling a PE teacher how unhealthy you eat"
Leah: "But you don't even know if I feel the same"
Elena: "Leah you had 1,825 days to tell me you felt the same but instead you were with Jordan"
Leah: "Because you never told me you felt the same"
Elena: "The Same... Leah I swear to you on everything I have... the two of us... we've never felt the same... not even in my dreams would you have felt as much as I did"
Leah: "But why didn't you tell me?"
Elena: "Because it's stupid to say, I showed you 5 years"
Leah: "But we dated one time and you said you couldn't"
Elena:,,Because whenever I kissed you...I thought about how you kissed her and I didn't want to be compared to jordan because I could never be a jordan...I'm Elena and I could never give you what jordan gave you and I didn't want...that...you realize what an idiot I am"
Leah: "Why didn't you tell me this morning..I don't want to say anything but we kissed yesterday"
Elena: "Cause I can't resist you and I hate that I can't"
Leah: "I even told you I love you yesterday and you said it back"
Elena: "And I didn't lie"
Leah: "But then why the thousand other girls?"
Elena: "Because I don't want to be in a relationship"
Leah: "But why?"
Elena:,,because I don't want to commit myself to anyone, because then all my happiness depends on one person and I don't want to get hurt"
Leah: "You never know if you've never tried it"
Elena:,,Now leave me alone with the shit that's my stuff not yours let's go in"
We went back to the others and decided to go home
The car ride was silent and I was the only one not drinking so I drove
I got out and Katie, Beth and viv somehow got in without throwing up
I saw Leah sleeping and didn't want to wake her up so I put her over my shoulder and put her in her bed
Leah: "Stay here" she said with a sleepy voice
Elena: ,,Good Night Leah"
and with that I went out and got the others to bed
It was now 4 a.m. and I was sitting in the dark in the kitchen, just thinking
I finally took off my jacket and the note with Jaymie's number fell out
I thought long and hard about writing to her, but then I just did it

we have been writing for a long time and i must honestly say she is nice

She is extremely nice, charming, likes soccer and good looking I'm doing what I should have been doing for the last 5 years
she gave me her address and we said good night to eachother and then i went to bed