I wish you loved me in the ways I did.
I didn't want someone else, not him, not her.
You
So why couldn't that happen? Why couldn't you love me?
Was I really that bad?
Was it that easy to let go of what we had?
I don't know..and that's the problem.
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*Wynter's Pov!*
My bed is cold tonight, colder than usual. My skin felt icy, slowly turning numb. This isn't just a physical feeling, It's a mental one. My mind is frozen, I don't feel anything, only Theo. My body shakes at the thought of it, the thought of him. The person he is inside my head scares me, terrifies me. He blames me, for everything. The guilt eats me up, especially on dark nights like this. Why wasn't it me? He was amazing, perfect at everything that he did. Why do I deserve to live, but not him? "Wyn, that answer is simple." My body springs up from my bed, looking around the room.
My eyes find his eyes, they are inches away from me. He is so close, but so far away. The tears can't stop around him, I wish they would but they never do. He wipes them harshly, bringing me ever closer. His lips quiver next to mine, is he...sad? "I wish you died, not me. You don't deserve to be upset! I do, I'm the one that suffered not you." He said as tears rolled down his cheeks. I closed my eyes, waiting. Waiting for his face to go away. But I opened them again, he was still there. I tried again, and again, until every time i shut them my tears kept pouring out. So I kept them shut, waiting for him to disappear.
"Shutting your eyes won't make me go away. You should know that it doesn't work like that Wynter." Theo then leaned closer. "You will never escape me, not until you understand...understand what you did to me. How you hurt me, you don't deserve this life. If you won't take it yourself...maybe I will for you." He then pushed me onto the bed, my eyes split open quickly. I searched for him, but Theo was gone. His eyes were drowning, full of pure anger. He wouldn't stop hurting me, never. I tried to pull away from him, to get him off of me. But he was stronger than me, he always was. But it was different, it was harsh and personal. Every punch had more and more hatred, towards me.
I screamed, I shut my eyes again wishing he would go away. He needed to, he needed to go away, he needed to stop. He needed to stop right now. "Theo stop it!" I cried out, sobbing from the pain. But he wouldn't. Not until my eyes opened, and I was slowly dying, blood all over the sheets. He laughed as my eyes struggled to stay open, he stared down at me. His smile, was so happy, so pure, so genuine. I hadn't seen that smile in years, usually it was because of a passed test or hanging with his friends. But it was because of me, because of my dying body laying right in front of him.
I was gone, at that moment I knew that. The person I am is dead. The person that didn't want to blame myself, that wanted to be happy, she just died. She isn't coming back, and neither is Theo. I cried my last few tears as my body stopped shaking. I stopped moving, I was frozen, not only inside my mind, but now physically. I died tonight, just like him. I'm gone, completely absent in my own body. My expression was pure sadness, pure guilt. I didn't feel this pain inside of me as much as I do right now. I am not the same person anymore, if I ended up surviving this or not. Wynter, I don't recognize who she is anymore, and I'm not so sure if I want to. Let's be honest, I don't.
I guess neither did he, even on my last breaths. He left too, I'm all alone.
