I wish you loved me in the ways I did.
I didn't want someone else, not him, not her.
You
So why couldn't that happen? Why couldn't you love me?
Was I really that bad?
Was it that easy to let go of what we had?
I don't know..and that's the problem.
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*Wynter's Pov!*
Cold water drifted back and forth on my feet as I sat on the ageing pier. The wind blew on my skin as goosebumps rose. I looked out onto the beach to see my mom waving at me. Her hand showed five fingers, meaning I had only that much time to get back home. I sighed, my skin peeled from the wood as I sat up and looked down at the raging waves. My body flew down and disappeared into the water as the ocean soon calmed. I swam near home and rain began to pour from the darkened sky.
I ended up getting back in a minute and while time passed I floated around in the water. Rain drops covered my skin as I breathed in the salty air. I pushed myself under and looked through the dim water. I searched for something, anything. Fish swam passed me abruptly as I watched them leave. I missed their presence and I wished for them to come back. To greet themselves, to make their existence known. But they left, and I hoped to see them again tomorrow.
I left the water and grabbed my towel off my dad's surfboard as my feet padded away on the sand, towards home. I looked out onto the ocean one more time before I made my way inside. My mom was sat on the couch with her favorite wine while my dad cooked. I could smell an aroma of spices as I led myself up to my room. I opened my door to see my second favorite place to be. My room wasn't big, but I managed.
Trust me though, it wasn't covered in sea shells or dolphin photos. This place, had no evidence of the ocean in it. To others, this was just a normal room. The bed, was bigger than I needed. The dresser, I definitely needed. But the rest, I couldn't say much about. Other than the water, this was the place I enjoyed being in. But after a few more seconds of thinking I got my things for a shower and placed them inside the bathroom across the hall. But it was interrupted when mom called me downstairs, seeming to be rather excited.
I scurried down the stairs as dad started to set the table. My mom then walked up to me and showed me the big ordeal. She and dad would be leaving in a few days for a trip they were given. The wow factor for mom, is the sum of money that was added on for just going. Plus not much expenses, most were complimentary. They would be gone for an entire week, and their work is paying for most of the travel issues that come along the way.
"Isn't this great?" She asked and I nodded. But as her excitement built up, so did the realization of it all. I would be home alone for a week. "Who..will be here?" I asked and dad responded. "No one, just you." We sat down and talked about it for a while, even through dinner. I would have rules, yes. But not much, I could still have friends over and money to get things. But the best part, I wouldn't have a limit with the water. I was able to be out there as long as I wanted.
My parents were happy, and so was I as dad talked about what they needed to bring. "We need to pack in advance, I don't want to leave unprepared." He was always the responsible one in the house. Unlike mom who forgets often, he was her daily reminder. It's like a push notification that she didn't know she needed. "So Wyn, what will you need while were gone?" She asked and I looked over to her.
"Just food, maybe some money but that's it." I said as she nodded. "I'll send money the night we leave. But right now, we need to sleep. It's already 10." She then brought her scraped down plate into the sink. And after her last sips of wine she was off to her room as I finally went to mine. My door creaked as it shut and that soon repeated when I went to the shower. I turned on the water and felt the hot feeling rush down my back.
I stayed there too long, way longer than I should have. But after I heard my dad walk up the stairs I quickly washed myself off and went out to see him. I looked around for him, but he wasn't around. Once I walked to my room though, I saw him looking through a box. I walked in and he immediately put it away and wiped dry tears from his face. "Sorry sweetheart, I just knew you had some." He said as pain screamed from his expressions.
"Dad, it's fine." I then took the box and opened it. I looked through the old pictures of Theo, my older brother. He died three years ago, Our house has been haunted ever since because of it. Because his death wasn't slow or easy. It was painful, even for him.
He was only a teenager, like me now. He had a whole world to see. Some days, I wish I was the one they lost, not him. But the world took him away, as well as the hope we had. The hope that he would live, that he would get through this. We held onto that hope for so long, and it eventually got thrown back at us. I just wish It didn't tear everyone apart in the process. Sometimes...I feel like my parents lost more through it all.
"I miss him." I told dad as he hugged me firmly. "I know, I do too." He responded as he then slowly walked to my door. "I know he would love the person you have become Wyn, you were the light in his world." He said as he slowly shut the door. I broke down as I thought about the words he said.
I hope I was the light, I really hope I was and still am.
