The Worst Choice of my Life (a Gratsu fanfic)

Pt. 1

"Look, I was just stupid okay!? A guy could never satisfy me the way a girl could!"

Those words haunted me. I just don't understand. I gave him everything I had, so why? Why would he choose Juvia over me? He even told me how much he hated her and how annoying he thought she was, so why? These questions just don't stop coming, I don't think I've ever just stopped to think for this long, my head feels like it's gonna explode.

I slammed my fist onto the table which made everyone there look up at me. 

"Hey Natsu, everything alright?" Lucy asked.

Right, I haven't told them about it yet. Only Happy knows.

I took in my surroundings. The guild hall was pretty normal, except that I wasn't in a fight at the time. Mira was chatting away with Elfman and Lisanna while doing her job at the bar, Macao and Wakaba were flirting with Kinana and Laki, Nab was looking at the request board once again, everything was about the same. About.

"Oh, sorry 'bout that Luce, I was thinking about how I'll beat Sting up in our next battle, he'll never win again!" I put on a poker face.

My inner selves were at it again. 'What the hell man? You can tell her, she's your friend!' One yelled. 'Yeah but, I don't want to trouble her, especially since she finally got herself a boyfriend!' The other argued. 'Ok well still, you shouldn't've lied! Anybody can see through that fake smile!' Well crap.

Lucy's eyes softened and she turned her full attention to me. As did Levy and Erza. "You can tell us. We're your friends, you don't have to lie." Wow, I had no idea Erza's voice could be so soft.

"Oh I'm not lying. I feel fine really, maybe I just need to get some rest." 'Still not telling her huh?'

I ignored my inner self and stood up. I decided to head back home, Wendy and Carla came over before I left for the guild so Happy stayed there. I flashed my signature smile back at the girls before taking off. I feel guilty for not telling them, really. But I don't think having them hate Gray would be any better of an idea.

"Ugh, I can't decide whether I made the right call." I said to nobody in particular on my way back home. My head was pounding and I could still hear the faint voices of my inner selves while I tried tuning them out again. I looked up and took in my surroundings. I was at the lake in the forest near our guild hall. The water glistened with the light reflecting on the surface of it, making it look like someone scattered glitter all over it. The animals peacefully had their heads down, drinking the lake's refreshing water, not seeming to be afraid of my presence. The trees were tall and towering but didn't give off any sense of enclosure. 

'The little things in life, you need to stop and look at them sometimes; it'll clear your head up and slow things down. When anything's too overwhelming, just stop and look at your surroundings. It's a really good way of calming down.' I realized.

Ultimately, it took a couple hours for me to get home when it would usually only take a couple minutes. When I walked through the doors, the smell of food and sounds of laughter were the first thing I caught onto. 

"Hey! Whatcha cooking?" I took everyone by surprise.

"Oh, I didn't realize you were back Natsu. It's actually a new recipe I found. It's a dish from a whole other continent. I believe it's called Hawaiian Pizza. It's made with pizza sauce, mozzarella, cooked ham, and pineapples. Come, sit down!" Oh, forgot to say, Carla is an amazing chef. Although she's still pretty new to the profession since she only got a human form a while ago, she learned really quickly for a beginner. With this level of expertise, I'm sure she could make it into the Hall of Fame.

I went to sit down with Wendy and Happy at the table. Carla set the pizza down and Happy and I instantly grabbed a slice.

"Ow, that's hot!" We cried in unison.

"Well that's what you get, you did just see me take it out of the oven, you impatient brats." Carla simply said. Wendy let out a little laugh.

I took a bite after the pizza cooled down a bit. It was delicious! Because the pizza was still hot, the cheese instantly melted in my mouth, while the salty taste of the ham complemented the sweet and sour tastes of the pineapple amazingly. I've eaten regular pizzas like cheese and pepperoni but this, this was something else. Of course, are all Halawian pizzas like this, no idea, because as far as I know, it could be because Carla was the chef behind this masterpiece. And I think Wendy and Happy definitely agree with me because we all devoured that tiny circle within a matter of minutes.

"So Natsu, we heard from Happy what happened a couple of days ago. Are you holding up alright?" Carla asked in a sweet tone - one I think I've never heard before. I gave a quick glare at Happy saying You told them? before softening my gaze and looking back at Carla and Wendy who were waiting patiently for an answer. 

"Yeah, I'm alright, I just need a bit of time to understand what happened before I open up to the guild and more importantly, our friends about it." I answer with a sigh.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Wendy's face soften into a reassuring smile. "Well, you can always count on us to comfort you about it. If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, we're here, and I don't just mean the three of us but Lucy and Erza too. I think you'll probably feel better once you tell them about it so try not to put it off too long okay?" I nodded, showing that I heard her. They left soon after that.

"He broke up with me a few days ago."

Levy and Lucy looked up at me in shock. "Wait you don't mean-" Lucy stopped, feeling a presence. She turned to her left slowly, scared she'll get on her bad side. 

"I'll kill him." 

Erza. She had the most murderous look on her face. Her eyes showed pure hatred as they glowed with a devil-red under her hair. I sighed, I knew this would be the outcome.

The guild doors then opened. There he was. Gray, with Juvia in his arms, a smirk plastered on his face. He walked up to me. 

"I was right, I'm so much happier now that I'm with a girl." He whispered into my ear. Tears burned the corners of my eyes. 

 "Gray." Upon hearing his name called out in that tone from that voice, he gulped. He slowly regained his posture and turned to face Erza.

I stood up and ran out of the guild. 

Getting closer to my house, I heard cackles and voices. I learned later that while I was at the guild, Happy had asked Wendy and Carla to come over again. For the rest of the evening, the 4 of us had fun, playing board games, comforting me, having food fights and all that. I smiled, I felt happy again for the first time in a while. As long as I had my friends, everything would turn out alright. Right?

Even though days had passed, I couldn't shake the feeling of hurt and betrayal. Coming to the conclusion of needing to talk to someone outside of the guild, I decided to go on a mission - to find my brother, Zeref.

"Hey Luce! I'm going to find Zeref, you wanna come along?" I wouldn't be able to survive alone, especially in this state.

"Oh, sorry Natsu but I have plans with Loke, but I'm sure we can go on another mission together soon!" Looks like Lucy was out.

"I'm going to find Zeref, you wanna come along?" 

"I wouldn't be much help since I'm... trying to figure something out about myself." Erza couldn't go either.

"Hey Natsu! How about Carla, Happy and I go with you on this mission?" Wendy asked quickly after seeing the sad look on my face after having two of my friends unable to tag along.

I looked up at her. I could feel tears in my eyes once again, but for a different reason this time. I simply smiled and nodded. Ready or not brother, I'm gonna throw a boulder onto your shoulders so let's see how you'll be able to word this so you don't hurt me!