b.f.b { sunjay }

16

jay's pov

"we should stop this." 

i immediately sat up from my comfortable position on the bed. my heart began to race from the sudden statement that the younger had made.

"what- what do you mean?" i moved my body so that i was facing sunoo. the red head just placed his head between his propped up knees and didn't reply for a while.

"we should end this... whole thing..." he paused in the middle of his sentence.

"look at me, sunoo." i ordered the latter.

he finally turned his head so that i can see his tear-filled eyes.

"i don't want to do this anymore, hyung." his tears fell as he stared into my eyes.

after hearing those words, my heart felt like it had shattered into a million shards that continuously stabbed into me.

it wasn't that i cared so much about the sex, it was about the fact that he didn't want to be with me anymore.

i assumed everything was going great. i mean, i thought that through our hookups, we were growing closer. i didn't wan to lose that.

"why? what changed?" i managed to reply while feeling a large lump growing in my throat.

"i just can't take it anymore. i don't want this deal to continue. i'm sorry, jay hyung."

"is that what you really want?" i asked one last final time, hoping that his answer would change. 

i didn't want to lose him.

he slowly nodded and then turned away from me again. we sat in silence.

all i could feel was hurt. i was hurt that he didn't want anymore silly flirting, anymore talking about useless things while we cuddled in bed, those tender kisses we shared. i guess those things didn't mean as much to him as they meant to me.

and most of all, i was hurt that he didn't want me.

"okay." i stood from his bedding and began to collect my clothing to redress myself. i felt his stares follow me as i dressed.

after i was completely clothed, i walked back over towards the bed and leaned down to place the last lingering kiss onto his temple. i allowed the tears that stinged my eyes to fall.

"goodnight, sunoo." i gave the younger a pained smile before making my way out of his bedroom.

i felt my heart grow heavier and heavier with every step i took down the staircase and out the main door.

i've never felt this shitty in my life.

all i wanted to do was run back into his house and beg him to stay but that's not what i did.

i wanted to respect his wishes.

i simply dragged my feet to the house next door and dragged myself into the front door.

oddly enough, i seen the living room light was on, so i walked in to see sunghoon on the couch with some popcorn.

"hey, hyung. you're back early, it's only twelve." he rambled, not even sparing me a glance as he watched the tv.

i didn't reply because i knew my voice would sound shaky from the tears came down like a waterfall without any intentions of stopping. 

when he noticed that i didn't reply, he paused the television to look back towards me.

rising from his seat, he took in my appearance and immediately rushed to me and engulfed me into an embrace.

"what the fuck happened?" he questioned my current state.