FIGHT OF LOVE AND HATE

Questioning?

Olivia POV

"Olivia, what happen?" her mom asked me. I just sighed "The rogue's—" 

"We heard that from Ava, What happen to you Olivia?" I bit my lip and shook my head. "Nothing just stressed about Ben" I answered and walked in kitchen to grab a water bottle. 

"Are you sure Olivia" Mom asked with other's following behind her in the kitchen. I hummed taking a sip from the bottle. "Okay well, kids go to sleep, I want each and everyone of you kids and adults, I am talking to both of you men's included no drink buddies tonight" she quoted specifically and glared at the men's.

"Be up early tomorrow morning me and Sophia will need extra hands. Understood" she asked looking at everyone, although no one replied. 

"Guys she asked a question if I am correct is that understood" Mom stated with authority in her tone. 

"Yesss!" We said at the same time and looked at each other not daring to utter a word in front of these women's. 

"What are you guys waiting for then go to your bed's" mom said walking off with dad and Mr & Mrs Lopez. 

"Damm feels like we are kids now" Theo whispered making us chuckle. "We heard you, go to your beds if you don't want to see me angry." Mrs Lopez said, quickly me and Andrea said goodbye to Liam and Theo and walked off to our respective rooms.

 "So how was your date night hmm" she said teasingly bumping her shoulder's with mine. At this moment I should be blushing and telling her it was going great having an actual conversation but it didn't. I remember how she backed away from my touch. When I held her face, I saw her eyes. There was something in it I could not explain or express to anyone what it was. I remember how she questioned me asking is this another act of mine to kill her this time, her questioning how my ex was a paid up friend acting in front of her. All these leads to only one thing.......She hasn't forgiven me and— "Liv, I am asking you something, how was—" 

"She doesn't trust me." "What?" Andrea exclaimed. 

"She asked me whether this me asking for forgiveness is a plan to kill her again or where we ran into my ex at the restaurant is an act done by my other friend to gain sympathy from her." "Liv, I don't think it's not tru—" 

"Then what is it Andrea, I don't know what to do, I know I messed up big time, tried to kill the person who was deeply in love with me and now I am having feelings for her, and she resents me now. What do I do, ask for forgiveness, guess what I did, ask her what I should do for her to give me chance again for real, guess what I did and she did give me chance but she is still not sure about it." 

"To be honest Liv, I don't know what to say, you fucked up big time, imagine yourself in her place, your love of the life is taking you out kissing you, giving you hopes for her to just kill you in the end, and then guess what you are angry, heart and mind filled with hatred all you feel is betrayed and then she comes back in your life asking for forgiveness and confess that she has feelings for you too. How hard would it be for you to trust her? Think about it, take a walk, think about it with a fresh mind, then come to the room and sleep and start working on for her to trust you but I will also say, think about one thing too: are you too deeply in love with her as she is, or it's just a thinking. It is an important factor too. Goodnight." she said and walked away.

..........................

 What am I supposed to do after doing the one thing no one would have dreamt of doing to their partner's. After thinking deeply about what Andrea said, I don't want to live with her. I need her to be by my side, I want all the moments I spend plotting and planning to kill her to live again except this time with loving her with all my heart. I want to go in the forest late at night with her again. Sitting by the waterfall, I want to hold her in my arms. Now it's not a want but has become a need for her to trust me, accept me in her life and love me back how she did before. All those unexpected visits at the station, all those text messages when she was missing me. I want all of that with her.

 Walking up to my room I heard noises coming from Ava's room. I slowly and steadily walked towards her room, creaking open the door just to find her moving on her bed in her deep sleep. It's clear that she is having a nightmare, I walked closer to her bed, reaching I saw her, she was sweating and moving around in her sleep. Sitting beside her I bent down a bit taking a hold of her shoulder trying to stop her from shaking so vigorously but doing that was a bad decision on my part because the moment I touched her and her eye shot open and in seconds she had me pinned down on her bed with her hand taking a firm grip on my neck choking me. 

"What are you doing here, planning to kill me again" she whispered angrily, putting more pressure on my neck making it difficult for me to breathe. Both of my hands were on the wrist of her left hand trying to push it backwards but it was no use.

 "Ava I can—cannot breathe" I choked out each word out my mouth with desperate need of air, hoping Ava snaps back but she doesn't. "Av–ava please." But it was no use as if she was in a trance or hypnotized by someone. It didn't take long for Theo to barge in room followed by Liam and her parents. 

Theo wasted no time by grabbing Ava and taking her off me, I gasped taking deep breaths. Liam was by my side. "Liv are you okay, Liv." 

"Liv, honey, have water" said Isabelle, handing the glass to me. 

"In what world are you doing Ava." Willam screamed in anger at her. 

"Liv, are you feeling–" "I am fine, I am fine." I said and got up from bed. 

"What happened?" Mom questioned coming into the room followed by dad and Andrea. I lifted my head to take a glance at Ava. She stood there no more fighting off the grip on her waist of Theo, she was just standing there with a shock or a confused face as to what happened. But one thing I knew for sure that I don't think Ava is ready or will ever be ready to trust me fully. Now or ever.

 "Nothing happened, she was just having a bad nightmare. Nothing else." I informed everyone. "I think it's better we all should go to sleep, it's late we have to wake up early too anyways." I said wishing everyone a goodnight and walked off to my room into the bathroom closing the door behind me. 

Standing near the faucet, turning it on and splashing the cold water on my face. Closing the tap off, I grabbed a cloth wiping my face off it and stared right in ahead in the mirror looking at myself. This is me, hurting people who genuinely care for me enough for them to hate or be with people who just keep on hurting me.

 There is no loophole that I can get out of this and live a life. At the thought of this my heart starts beating fast, " Liv are you in here?" I heard Andrea call out for me, but I didn't reply. I couldn't because of my shortness of breath even though I did nothing to make me so restless. 

"Liv, Theo told me what happened, are you okay?" she questioned with a worried tone. I looked ahead, staring straight in my eye and tried controlling my breathing, deep breath in and out in and out. Calming myself down, I let my eyes wander towards my neck where the bruise had started to form. Her handprint on my neck was so hard that if nobody had entered the room within 3 seconds I would be in hospital or maybe dead. 

Shaking my head I fixed myself and walked out, finding Andrea sitting at the foot of the bed. "Hey you alright?" I nodded my head, "Yes, why won't I be" I replied ignoring her stare and going to my side of the bed. Not thinking twice Andrea said "Is your neck hurting?" I froze for a moment. Is my neck hurting? Yes it has already formed a bruise but that is not what I am thinking of, I am hurting, I am in pain because of what I have done to her and now what she has become because of it. She wasn't like this before, but I turned her down. She has the ability to control her anger, but because of me she lost it. 

She had the ability to be happy and look at the positive sides but I broke it.

 "Yes I am alright, let's get to bed." I said and laid down wishing to god that I merely interact with her so that she doesn't have to go through things just by looking at me. It hurts right, the one person in your life who would have done anything just to see your smile is broken because you broke their trust and now has changed into someone nobody wishes them to be.