FIGHT OF LOVE AND HATE

Caught in Act

"Done," I said, closing the last file and smiling in victory. Finally, I am done with work. Now, all I need is to fill my stomach. Looking at my watch, I saw it's past 12:00. God, I am so hungry right now. I could have just taken up the sandwich Ava made for me, but I felt like I shouldn't. I don't know why, but it didn't feel right to take it, even though every ounce of my body and my heart was against my decision. But I had to, to keep my distance slow, small, and steady. I would be lying if I said I didn't have even a one-second thought of just taking the food and kissing her on the forehead, or just taking away the hurt I saw in her eyes. But I left the moment she went into the pantry to cut fruits for me.

"May we come in?" I heard a bunch of voices. I smiled knowingly; it's Andrea, Sira, and Diana. "Yes, you may."

"Lucky you, we bought sandwiches and coffee too," Diana said, placing the plastic bags on the table.

I sighed happily at the smell of the sandwiches and hmmmm... fresh coffee. "You guys are lifesavers."

"Duh, that's why we are cops and detectives," Sira replied, making us chuckle.

I quickly took out my sandwiches and took a big bite, moaning at the delicious taste of my food, which made me lean my head back just an inch to savor it. Damn, I am hungry as heck. I opened my eyes to see all three of them looking at me dumbfoundedly.

"Did you not have breakfast?" Andrea questioned.

I shook my head while wiping the sauce of the sandwich off the corner of my lips. "Makes sense," Sira said, shrugging her shoulders and devouring her own food. I ignored them and just focused on my food. Nothing mattered in this world right now except me and my food. Ignoring and muting out the external voices which din't matter.

"This sandwich is damn amazing gu—" I opened my eyes to see all of them staring at the door, my eyes moved from then to the door where Ava is standing there with a plastic bag in her hands. Shit! She was looking at me straight in my eyes. Double Shit! I am eating a sandwich; by now, of course, she has figured out I was lying this morning. Fucking hell.

"Hey Ava, what brings you here?" Andrea questioned, making Ava break our eye contact and look at her.

"I-I came here to bring food for Olivia. She didn't have any breakfast this morning, so I thought to bring her some fruits and soup because she said she wasn't feeling well in the morning," she sighed, then glanced at me, "but I guess she is already feeling better."

She wanted to say more. She wanted to say something to me, but she didn't... But her eyes did it for her. No words were needed to be said; her watery eyes sent a clear message to me that she was hurt. Before I could say something, she did.

"I should leave you all to enjoy your food," she said and walked out, not even hearing Andrea say that it's not an issue. I quickly stood up to go after her, but Andrea interrupted.

"Are you sick?"

"No, for God's sake, Andrea. I lied to her because she made me breakfast, but I didn't want to eat it because my stupid mind thought it was a better way to start keeping distance from her," I said and ran behind Ava to stop her. Running out of the station, I saw her walking towards her car.

"Ava," I screamed, walking faster. She ignored my pleas. I ran even faster. "Ava, please stop." She didn't, not until I had a hold of her wrist and turned her around to face me.

"Please stop," I said, looking at her face with the unshed tears threatening to fall. She was controlling it. "Tell me why, Ava? Just give me one goddamn reason," she said in a high pitch. I was taken aback by her outburst.

"I-I, what happened, Ava?"

"Do you hate me now? Did you just stop having feelings for me? All those apologies, pleading to ask me for one more chance, and now you don't want to do anything with me so bad that you lied to me about being sick. What, now you don't trust me with anything that you cannot even eat the food I make for you? Tell me, Liv, fucking tell me. Are you scared of me? Then fucking tell me to my face; I will stop talking to you. I will stop and make sure you don't see my face at the house. Tell me, I know I scared you off with what I did and said, but at least don't lie to me. It hurts, Liv. It hurts too much; I am tired. I cannot handle this and the overthinking," she said, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Say something—" I stopped her rant mid-sentence, taking hold of her cheeks and kissed her like there is no tomorrow. I just wanted to savor this moment, trying to take all the pain and hurt she has been through. I pulled my lips away from her, resting my forehead on hers.

"I fucking love you, Ava. I love you!"