A rush of emotion and memory comes flooding back to me as April, Thiago, Ominis and I approach the colony grounds with Anja. The soft and powerful thud of her hooves on the forest floor as she leads our little group sounds like a kind of ancient drumming my heart understands, despite the fact that I feel entirely out of my depth. And that's even in light of the fact that Anja and I just had a relatively enlightening and hopeful conversation – a remarkably profound analysis of love, given the fact that we shared no more than half an hour.
'Remember - centaurs get straight to the point, and they go deep,' April's voice reminds me, as she has been doing frequently these past few days.
It doesn't change much regarding my tumultuous inner state given that the last time I was here – the only time I was in this very spot – was when I accidentally apparated with April on the night of the sorting ceremony. I can feel it all as clearly as if it were last night. I was so mortified. So terrified. So convinced I had ruined and would continue to ruin her life. So sure that she and I being together would be catastrophic, given the way we amplify one another's feelings and magic. So afraid about the wounds that were twisted up the side of her body, and so incredibly honored to have been there to help her and heal her, though nervous out of my mind to do so.
Oh she was angry with me that night. And she was right to be.
Such a paralyzed, scared little arse you can be, Sebastian!
I pause to look behind me, allowing Anja to walk ahead some more, and my current feelings couldn't be more opposite from that night. Thiago and Ominis are smiling, laughing, walking hand-in-arm to Thiago's right. April has slung her hand through Thiago's left elbow and listens to their chatter, smiling intently.
My brother. My friend. My love.
Three wonderful things I didn't really have just six or eight weeks ago. It makes my heart swell as if it were outside of my body and, though I can feel the echoes of habitual emotion within me that whisper 'you don't deserve this, Sebastian,' or, 'you're only going to screw it up again, boy-o' the fact is I can barely hear them. It's not at all like it used to be.
When my eyes catch April's – the angel of my life, who's love has worked miracles in such a short amount of time – she smiles as radiantly as a rainbow and squeezes Thiago's arm, breaking free to bound forward a few steps towards me. "This hand is much too empty, my good sir!" she says in a silly way that makes me chuckle.
Merlin's beard her fingers fits so perfectly in mine.
April smells vaguely of cinnamon, as always, but whatever it is that gives her enchanting scent its notes of almond and floral jasmine is stronger today. It must be the influence of the woods around us drawing it out of her and amplifying it: the gradual seeping of water through the lichen and moss on the trees that smells like aloe, or the perfume of pollen dust on the backsides of the occasional bee darting by in defiance of the chill of autumn, or the comforting, warm scent of vegetative decay in the leaves and twigs that break down beneath our feet.
I can't help myself from leaning over and kissing April's head, inhaling the enchanting smell of her hair, and indulging in feeling close to her. Her presence calms me in a way little else does.
How could I have been terrified of this?
"Who is Vannevar, exactly? And when did you meet him?" I hear Ominis ask Thiago.
"Ah! Yes – it was the first night I arrived at Hogwarts! With the Minister of Magic Spavin," Thiago begins to dutifully report. "It was not a kind encounter. He was volatile. Intimidating, and–
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Return of Sebastian Sallow | 10 Yr After Hogwarts
FanfikceTen years after I began at Hogwarts, Sebastian Sallow is back. And he's Professor Sallow now. He disappeared after the fall of Ranrok and Rookwood, after I lost Professor Fig, and after Ominis and I couldn't keep him from losing himself. But I never...