Sometimes Love Isn't Enough

Shake It Out

**Time Skip New Year's Eve**

We had a nice quiet Christmas, just the 3 of us. Brendon and I are working hard on our relationship, and we are making the most of our time together. We've not received the results of the paternity test yet, but hopefully, we will get them soon. Don't get me wrong, things are far from normal, and the possibility of him fathering a child with someone else still really hurts.

Brendon is oit in his studio, and I am making the most of Skai's nap time by treating myself to a hit bubble bath. Through the baby monitor, I can hear Skai's gentle snores, and I can't believe that this little person has, in such a short time, made such a huge impact on our lives. It's hard to remember a time when she wasn't here. I'm so deep in thought that I don't even hear Brendon coming into the bathroom.
"Carly.......Carly!!"
"Sorry, what?"
"I was asking if you were OK? You looked like you had zoned out."
"Sorry, yeah, I'm fine. I was just thinking about everything that's happened this year. The good and the bad. Honestly, I'll be glad to see the back of this year."

I'm now watching Brendon, who is starting to undress.
"Move over, Carly. I'm coming to join you."
"Oh, do you think so." I joke, making room for him.
"Yeah, it's been a hell of a year. I know I sound like a broken record, but I really am sorry for all the shit that went down."
"I know you are Bren.... You need to let it go, though. We can't keep going over and over the same thing it just reopens old wounds and makes it harder to heal."
"I know, but there was a time not so long ago that I thought we were over. That you were going to leave me."
"I came so close to leaving Bren, but as I said before, we owe it to Skai to try and make it work. Plus, even after everything you've put me through, for some bloody reason, I still love you. I've loved you for 15 years, Bren, that's  half our lives. .I can't just walk away from that. Does that make me stupid for staying with you?"
"I honestly can't believe you're standing by me, Carly. I love you so much, and I am grateful for the chance to work on us. If only we knew the results of the paternity test, we could start the new year afresh."
"Look, Bren, the results will be in when they're ready. Let's just let our hair down and enjoy Petes' party tonight, ok?"
"Ok....how did I get so lucky to have you in my life?" He asks, placing his lips onto mine. His kisses start to become more heated, and I can feel his erection against my back. He's kissing and sucking his way along the back of my neck and shoulders.
"Fuck Carly I need to be inside you....." Suddenly loud cries erupt from the baby monitor breaking the mood. I burst out laughing.
"Sorry Bren,: I laigh. "You've just been cock blocked by your daughter". As Im getting out of the bath, I see him playfully pouting.
"Don't worry, I promise we will finish this later."

** Brendon's POV **

I watch Carlyn leave the bathroom to check on Skai. I really can't believe she's still here. I don't know what I did to deserve her, but I am so fuckn grateful. I will NEVER, EVER risk my family for anything ever again. I can hear her talking to Skai through the baby monitor.
"Hello there, little lady, did you have a good nap. Let's get you up and fed while daddy's in the bath. He's feeling a little frustrated." she laughs gently.
I can't help but smile listening into their little conversation.
Once I'm ready, I head into the kitchen and see Skai enjoying her baby food.
"Let me finish feeding her while you get ready. I've just my clothes to change."
"You sure?"
"Yeah, go get ready!"
I watch Carlyn leave and smile, knowing how lucky I am. This New Year's Eve could have been so much different. I could be sitting here all alone with no family. I could have lost everything.

------------------------------------------------

When we arrive at Pete's, the party is already in full swing.
"Hey, Uries, come in, come in." Pete shouts over the noise.
"I've set up the travel Cot for Skai in the spare room, dump your bags in there, and come join the fun. You're both looking happier. It's good to see. Come on, Skai, Uncle Pete will take you to Bronx and Saint."
"Thanks, Pete. We'll be back in a minute."
As we head into the party, Brendon grabs my hand and entwines his fingers with mine. As we enter, Patrick hands us our drinks, and I spy Nicole and Mike by the snacks. I give them a small wave.
"Let's go and see Mike and Nicole." I suggest. After the night they babysat for us, I am certain they are together. Although I can definitely understand why they would be keeping it on the down low.
Making our way across the room, Brendon whispers in my ear.
"Nicole and Mike are quite close, aren't they? Do you think there's something going on with them?" I stiffle a giggle
"Like, what Bren? A relationship?"
"No, I would know if that was happening. I'm good at picking up on those things."
Nicole pulls me into a hug. "It's great to see you both looking happier. Did you have a good Christmas?"
"We did. Thanks, how about you?" I ask her, wiggling my eyebrows as Nicole blushes. We both start laughing.
"We did, a very good one." they both smile.
Meanwhile, Brendon is keeping a close eye on Skai, who is being entertained by all her uncles and aunts. He turns to Mike.
"You and Nicole look pretty close. I think you like her." he sings. I roll my eyes at them both and laugh. Brendon looks at me puzzled.
"Carlyn, are you ok? Have I missed something?."
"Oh, will you two please talk to Brendon before he does something stupid like trying and set you up together?" I laugh, leaving them to go and collect Skai, who looks rather tired. Brendon comes over with some more drinks and looks like a kid in a toy shop.
"Carly, Mike, and Nicole are together. Like together together, as in a couple," he says excitedly. I hate to burst his bubble.
"I know I whisper,"
"How did you know?" he questions.
"Oh, Bren, I've known since the night they babysat for us. It was pretty obvious. I thought you were good at picking up on those kinds of things. " I joke.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't know for definite, plus I'm pretty sure they wanted to tell you themselves once they were ready. It wasn't my news to tell."
"I must be losing my touch," he says, shaking his head  as he takes Skai from me.  Just then, Brendon's phone alerts him to an incoming text message. He looks at his phone and then at me.
"It's the clinic. The paternity results are ready. They've emailed them over."
"Come on," Ibtell him, looking at Skai, who is almost asleep in his arms. "let's put Skai to bed, and you can open the email in there, where it's quieter."
We head to the bedroom, and I get Skai changed and ready for bed. Meanwhile, Brendon is pacing back and forth like a caged animal.
"Bren, will you please stop pacing and just open the email."
"I'm nervous, Carlyn. Once we know that's it. There's no going back.  I could have another child."
"Well, that was kinda the reason WHY you got the test done. Bren, do you want me to open it for you?"
"No, I'll do it...." I can see his hand shaking as he holds his phone. I'm holding Skai, unaware that I'm also holding my breath. Brendon looks up from his screen. His eyes glistening with tears. Is this a good sign? He mutters something that I can't quite catch
"It's mine........Carlyn, it's mine." he says, his voice cracking. "I'm so fuckn sorry!"
I let out the breath that I was holding. Feeling a tear running down my cheek. Brendon cups my face in his hands, wiping away the stray tear with his thumb.
"I'm so so sorry, Babe." Skai looks between us both mesmerised by what is happening.
"At least we know for definite now, Bren. I can't say I'm happy, but it's happening, and it's not the baby's fault. I will support what you want to do, but you will need to discuss things with Elise. Skai's going to have a sibling, and she has a right to know them. I can't, and I won't stand in the way of that."
"Brendon takes Skai giving her kisses and cuddles.
"Da da." we hear. We both look at each other. How ironic Skais first word comes as we learn that Brendon's going to a dad again.
"Da da." she says again, pleased with herself. "Clever girl." I say, placing her in the cot with her blanket and switching on the baby monitor. "Goodnight, princess."

We decide to keep the news to ourselves for tonight and try and enjoy the rest of the party. Brendon stays by my side for the rest of the night despite my protests that I'm OK and that he should go and see the guys. We mingle, join in the fun, and enjoy a few more drinks before the big countdown. As the year comes to an end, Pete and Patrick are on top of the coffee table, leading the countdown.
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. HAPPY NEW YEAR! everyone shouts. Brendon cups my face in his hands, kissing me. "Happy New Year, Carly. I love you." he says into the kiss.
"Happy New Year, Bren, I love you too. Let's just enjoy what's left of tonight. We can start dealing with this shit show tomorrow."