Diabolical | T. Drake ✔

[48] A Cup Of Coffee

Tim wanted to leave before his parents could see him there but luck wasn't in his favor. His mother caught sight of him standing by the metal gate and her face drained of color as if she had seen a ghost.

Jonathan observed Tim's unease so he decided to take him away. The boy seemed to have gotten rooted to the spot as Jonathan steered him behind himself, hiding him from view.

"What happened?" Jack turned to his wife as she had halted in shock.

"It's Timothy! He's here... I saw him..." Janet told him and it seemed as if they were aware that their son was alive and had intended to meet him too. Although they might not have thought they would meet him like that so unexpectedly.

A few years back when Tim's long-dead status had been cleared, the case had been all over the papers. Perhaps the Drakes had found out and come back to Gotham but whatever the case, they knew he was alive and not dead as they thought.

His survival could put them in trouble with the insurance company as they might have to repay the money. Perhaps that was why they hadn't approached Tim nor come back to their city in all those years.

Jonathan couldn't fathom any other reasons for the Drakes to be there on the spot. And he didn't have to as right then, all his attention was gravitating toward Tim.

"I don't want to see them," Tim's voice was a frightened whisper as he clung onto the sleeve of Jonathan's overcoat, not daring to look back at his parents. "We'll come here some other time. Right now, I just want to disappear..."

"Keep your head down then," Jonathan remarked, placing an arm around his shoulders as he walked away, dragging Tim along with him. 

It was possible that Janet would think she only mistook someone else for Tim and not follow after them. So Jonathan did not turn back even when the Drakes called out for him to stop. Instead, he steadily went to the bus stop and made Tim board the bus with him.

He had seen fear only once in Tim's eyes and that too was a hazy memory as Scarecrow had been in charge of him back then. He didn't recall much from that night other than finding Tim unconscious and calling Miguel to take him to the hospital.

But at the current moment, the expression he had seen in those blue eyes on witnessing Jack and Janet Drake could not be labeled anything other than fear. He had felt it, that distinct wave of unease radiating from the boy and how he had quickly taken cover behind him as if not wanting his parents to see him there.

The only thing he knew about the Drakes that could link to such a response from Tim was that they had probably tried to get rid of him for the insurance money that could pay off their debts. Perhaps they had done something to hurt him back then that had made him fear them.

After all, childhood traumas could stick with a person longer than any other fear could. No one could know it better than Jonathan Crane, the former expert in the field of fear and its effects on the human psyche.

He took Tim to the Narrows as he could see the boy wouldn't want to go back to the manor in such a state. He had to be calmed down first and though Jonathan did not know how he could be of any help to him, the least he could do was provide him company.

For some reason, Tim had chosen to come to him earlier as well when he had no idea how to deal with his emotions. Right then seemed no different as he did not object and followed him to his apartment.

"Tim, are you feeling okay now?" He asked cautiously, observing the boy every second yet finding his expression hard to read.

"I guess," he mumbled in reply, eyes staring ahead of him aimlessly, "can I get some coffee? I think I will feel better after a cup or two..."

"Sure."

He stood up to go to the kitchen to brew coffee for Tim as well as himself. He glanced out a few times but found Tim lost in thought as if trying to figure out himself what exactly was going on with him and why he reacted as such upon seeing his parents.

Of course, he knew Jack and Janet Drake were alive and there was a possibility that he would get to see them again in his life. But he hadn't been prepared back when he had seen them at Drake Manor. It was as if he had been thrust into his past life abruptly and got overwhelmed as all the memories of the time he had spent with his parents struck him with full force.

Now that he was away from them and in the isolated premises of Jonathan's apartment, he was reflecting on that moment, thinking if he could have handled it in another way. He might have to meet his parents eventually but he couldn't bring himself to get it done right then.

He needed time to prepare himself.

"Here's your coffee," Jonathan's steady voice shook him out of his thoughts and he looked up to see him set down the coffee cups on the table.

"Thanks. I am sorry for being such a bother..."

"It's no bother," he interrupted him, gesturing to him to drink the coffee without any further polite apologies.

Tim grabbed the cup and took a deep sip of the burning hot liquid. He would always drink coffee when it was scalding hot, perhaps in an attempt to wake himself from the numbing thoughts that surrounded him often.

Right then as the strong bitter taste of coffee settled in his mouth and burnt his taste buds, he felt the familiar sense of coming back to reality. And it soothed him a little so he decided to focus on the coffee for the time being.

Jonathan didn't ask him anything about his parents but Tim could see the questions going through the man's wise eyes. Tim finished his coffee in silence but then decided to share what he was going through with him.

"My parents and I didn't have the best of relationships," he mumbled in a soft cautious tone, "I wasn't expecting to see them today so I got shocked... That's all."

"What I saw in you back then wasn't shock," Jonathan remarked.

Tim looked slightly surprised, "really? Then what was it?"

"Fear. You are afraid of your parents." His reply was simple but it didn't sit right with Tim who hadn't before looked at it with that perspective. But as Jonathan had pointed out, he could now see why anyone would think that.

"I don't know," Tim ran his hands through his messy curls in an attempt to distract himself, "I shouldn't be afraid of them though. They didn't hurt me, I faked my death myself..."

But he couldn't push out the memories of those sleepless nights back at Drake Manor years ago when he had been unable to even close his eyes briefly out of fear that moment could be his last.

"I think I am more afraid of death," Tim resumed, voicing out his thoughts to him as he had found out that it always helped when he shared what he was thinking with a few close people such as Stephanie, Alfred, and Jonathan. "I didn't want to die back then, I don't want to die now... I didn't even have a life worth fighting for all those years back but now that I think about it, I have a lot to lose that I can't bear to part with... I can't lose the family and friends I have now... I can't die..."

"They are not here to hurt you, Timothy," he tried to be gentle while convincing him, "perhaps they have realized their mistake and want a fresh start?"

"I don't know..."

"And even if they don't have good intentions, you are not alone anymore," he added, reaching out to pat his head in what he assumed was an affectionate gesture; one that he had seen people use with younger children, "you have your family to look after you and then you also have me."

Tim let go of fumbling with his curls as he looked up at Jonathan with an unfathomable look in his eyes. It seemed as if he was at a loss of what to say, all the emotions inside him getting too overwhelming.

"Everything will be alright, you don't have to fret so much about it," Jonathan retrieved his hand from his head and then picked up the empty coffee cups from the table, taking the tray back to the kitchen.

***