moony and wood | r. lupin

to confess

"i smelled you."

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾

March 1977, Year 6

Hogsmeade Village

After that Potions class, things weren't quite the same between Evie and Remus as before.

Evie couldn't quite meet Remus' eyes, and Remus found himself stuttering more than he thought was even possible. His solution to the dilemma was to avoid confrontation entirely, thus avoid her entirely.

It was making Evie uneasy– she'd never experienced Remus give her such a cold shoulder. On Remus' end, however, it was more so he was trying to dodge humiliation than give a cold shoulder.

The whole scenario was starting to drive Remus mad, so he, for once, partook in his fellow Marauders' advice, and eventually decided to ask her just what it was she smelled in the potion.

-

The Gryffindors were at Hogsmeade the next Saturday evening. Lily had even convinced Mary to come, even if she was still recovering from a cold that had left her bed-ridden for a week beforehand. The sixth years traveled as one group, migrating from shop to shop, starting at Stitches and Draughts.

Remus couldn't stop thinking about how to deliver the question to Evie, even as Dorcas got her nose stuck in a nose-biting teacup at Zonko's, and as the socks Peter tried on began screaming that his feet were smelly at Gladrags' Wizardwear.

James was the only one who seemed to notice Remus' quieter-than-usual state, and how he communed with Evie much less than he usually did, and sent him a look when no one was paying attention. "Just do it. Pull her aside."

Remus nodded, making a face. He frowned to himself a moment after. It's just Evie, he reminded himself. He shouldn't have to worry when it comes to her.

The bunch had just left Spintwitches Sporting Needs (after James insisted on going in) and was headed to the Three Broomsticks when Remus placed a gentle hand on Evie's arm, holding her back. "Evie, could we talk?"

He felt numb as he said it– like his body was floating five feet above their heads.

The girl stopped, unsure of how to react. "Y-yeah, sure?"

Anything beginning with 'can we talk?' usually meant disaster, in Evie's book.

Remus lightly pulled her to the alley between the shops, waiting for the door of the inn to click shut before he began talking.

"Listen, I didn't mean to–"

"Remus, I don't know what I did, but I feel so horrible about it, and I'm sorry." Evie cut in.

The boy had to take a moment to comprehend what she said– she said it so quickly and so abruptly that he didn't quite know how to react. "Sorry, you... what?"

"I just– I don't want to be blunt, but it feels like you've been... keeping away from me and I didn't know what to do, so I was sort of doing the same thing, but the whole time, I've just felt so awful about it, because I don't even know what I did, and–"

"What?" Remus shook his head. "What are you even talking about?"

Evie frowned. "What do you mean, 'what am I talking about?' You've been ignoring me since two Wednesdays ago, and I don't even know why, but–"

"Evelyn, do you really think that's why I pulled you out here?"

"Well, given your reaction, I'm starting to think not!"

Their voices had begun to rise, bit by bit. Evie was starting to get worked up, her wringing fingers being replaced with clenched fists. How could Remus not know what she was going on about?

"That's not–"

"The fact that you don't even know what I'm talking about is mad, Remus, how can you not–"

"Evelyn," he stopped her, firmly gripping her biceps. "What did you smell in the Amortentia?"

The girl immediately froze, eyes wide. She maintained eye contact for only a moment, before looking away, struggling to recover.

"What–what did you smell in the Amortentia?"

Remus stopped. If she was dodging the question, then maybe...

A moment passed as he gathered his thoughts. "Evie, I've been trying to figure this out for the last Merlin knows how long, and..." he trailed off, moving a hand to her chin to move her face back up to his, holding the eye contact again. "I just don't want to lose you."

Evie's lips were trembling, Remus noticed. But he knew it wasn't from the cold.

She wanted to say something– anything– but she didn't know what.

Remus began to stammer. "I just– you are– sometimes I can't–"

Evie put her hand over his, still on her face, in reassurance. Her face had softened from its state of shock.

Remus took a deep breath.

"In the Amortentia," he tried, voice hovering barely over a whisper. "I smelled strawberries–" he moved his free hand to touch her hair. "And an ocean breeze–"

Evie's eyebrows furrowed.

"And pumpkin pasties."

Her eyes lit up, and she knew. He had smelled her after all.

It was then her turn to stammer– she didn't quite know where to begin. "Remus. I– you've always– I'm such an–" her eyes began watering, small tears streaking down her cheeks. "Why am I crying?" She laughed, half in hysterics. "You can't... you can't be joking, Remus, this isn't something you can–"

"I'm not joking."

"I swear to Merlin, if Sirius and James put you up to this–"

"Evie," he stroked her hair again. "They didn't. I'm being truthful."

The girl gasped, failing to find her words again. She figured she didn't need them– she shoved herself into him, hugging him as tightly as she could. He returned the embrace, smiling to himself.

"Now, if you don't mind my asking," Remus let the girl go, unwillingly. "What did you smell in the Amortentia?"

She laughed again, squeezing his hand. "You, Remus. I smelled you."

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾