Unexpected News (revamp)

Struggling with Nova (June 2020)

Billie
June 14th 2020
12:25 am

"Nova, shh it's okay, it's okay." I whisper to Nova over her screams.

She is against my chest with her head laying on my shoulder and I'm walking around my room, rocking her to calm her down. I kept patting her back to try and make her stop crying but I can't.

I laid her down in her bassinet and gave her her pacifier to hopefully calm her down. She spat it back out and started to scream again so I took my shirt off, laid down in bed and picked her up so I could breastfeed her.

She latched on and started sucking which made her calm down. I let out a breath of relief and wiped the tears from her face. I rubbed her back to make her more relaxed and she reached up to play with my blohsh necklace.

"Do you like my necklace? It's my blohsh necklace, blohsh is a little guy I made a couple years ago, it's my merch." I told her, she was just looking up at me and looking around at my wall.

"Now Nova, I love you and you are very cute but I am going to need you to go to sleep when you need to, is that okay with you?" She just grunted so she must've not agreed with me.

"Oh you not gonna go to sleep when you need to?" I asked her, she grunted again. "Okay, so you aren't going to let me get any sleep?" I asked her, she didn't do anything but look at me.

"Okay, thanks Nova. It's not like I carried you in my uterus for 9 months then pushed you out of my pussy which fucking hurt. I'm also a single mom because your dad is a fucking dick so cry as much as you want, it's fine by me."

She eventually fell asleep so I laid her in her bassinet and then I tried to go back to sleep. I was about to go to sleep until I heard Nova whining like she was about to cry so I quickly laid her on my chest and she calmed down.

1:18 am

I woke up because Nova was crying on my chest so I sat up and cradled her in my arms. I could smell that she had pooped so I laid her on my bed and got up to get a diaper.

I sat back down and then changed her diaper. I grabbed her pacifier from her bassinet and put it in her mouth. I picked her back up which made her scrunch up her body and then I placed her on my chest.

2:32 am

I woke up because Nova was crying so I sat up and cradled her in my arms. I lifted my top up and tried to breastfeed her but she didn't want that so I checked her diaper and she was clean so she must just want some attention.

I stood up and walked around my room while rocking her. I grabbed her pacifier from my bed because it must've fell out of her mouth when she was asleep. I put her pacifier in her mouth and she started to calm down.

"You just wanted your mama, didn't you." I whispered to her, she was just looking at me. "It's okay, I'm right here."

I felt a bit thirsty so I walked out of my room and walked into the kitchen. I got a glass and filled it up with water before walking back into my room. I got into bed and laid Nova on my chest.

I was about to fall asleep again until Nova started crying again. I sat up and started to rock her but she wouldn't calm down. I put her pacifier in her mouth since it fell out when she started crying. I took a guess that she's hungry so I lifted up my shirt and she latched on. I laid back down and fell asleep.

4:08 am

I woke up to Nova crying so I sat up and cradled her in her arms. I stood up from my bed and walked around whole rocking her. She wouldn't calm down so I tried to put her pacifier in her mouth but she spat it out.