Damaged Goods by slytherin_after_dark

Chapter 12

- NOT MY STORY!! ALL CREDITS TO @slytherin_after_dark ON A03!!
-

The room again. Cold. She knew what would happen next and yet she couldn't stop it. Bellatrix is there, staring at her with a wicked grin. Pain sears through her arm. It's relentless. The darkness of her magic leaks into her body and grips it tightly. She can't breathe. It's all there is. Vibrating in her bones.

With a loud gasp, she woke up but she felt like she was drowning. Water was gulping out of her. Gripping her neck, she ran to the bathroom, stumbling over a chair on the way, before she was able to turn on the light and run to the sink. Water was pouring out of her and then she realized it was dark grey slush. She looked in the mirror and her eyes were entirely black.

With a scream she woke up, turning on the light on her nightstand. For a moment she looked down on herself and inventory of herself. Soaked in sweat, her shirt is sticking to her skin. There is no black water. But her scar is scratched open again. Stumbling out of bed, she headed to her wand. The healing spell is second nature now, she's said it so many times. When it was done, she fell to her knees and started crying. She was so tired. Just so tired of feeling this way. Nothing had helped so far. No healers. No therapy. If only she could get rid of the scar, perhaps a crumb of her old life would return.

With the lack of sleep over the last few days she needed more makeup than normal to make herself look presentable. The dress she had chosen with Ginny was something the old Hermione would have liked. Lilac silk draped beautifully on her body. Ginny helped her with her hair and was excitedly talking about Harry's surprise birthday party she was planning next month. During the war, Hermione had been so scared to lose Harry that seeing him this happy now with Ginny always warmed her heart.

When they were dressed and ready to go, Harry knocked on the door.

"Are you decent?" He asked but was already inside the room.

He looked sharp in his tuxedo.

"Hermione, meet Alexander," he said and Alexander entered.

He was tall, had dark hair, and piercing blue eyes. "What a pleasure to meet you. Harry told me so many great things about you."

Alexander wasn't only very handsome, he was—according to Harry—accomplished, funny, and kind. And she was—a mess.

"Nice to meet you, too," she answered.

"You look absolutely beautiful if I might add."

She felt like that must be a lie but she took the compliment and the four of them made their way to the ballroom.

Alexander asked her about her potions course and how she was enjoying being back at Hogwarts. He was a good listener and thoughtful conversationalist. In another life, she might have really liked him.

When they entered the ballroom, Hermione felt out of place. Girls in beautiful gowns. Guys in fancy tuxes. But that's not what made her feel like a foreign body. Everyone seemed happy. They smiled. They danced. They were laughing and drinking. As if nothing had ever happened.

"Excuse me for one moment," she said to Alexander before she disappeared into the bathroom.

Locking the stall, she pulled out the small vial of gavisus potion. It made you happy. Only for three hours but by then she would leave. For those blissful three hours, she would not be a burden to her friends. She would be normal.

The potion tasted bitter and she grimaced after she had downed it in full. Then she returned to the ballroom. It would take 15 minutes to kick in.

Harry and Ginny were already dancing. The way they looked at each other made her heart melt.