Article 1- Best Friend to SPOUSE: A Perfect Match?

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Ah! The most ever-loving being we desire is our best friend

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Ah! The most ever-loving being we desire is our best friend. I too had one among my Nav Ratans - the Nine Gems, who was closest to me, just as Birbal was to Akbar. The Emperor was lucky and was safe from the incident of a falling-out, but I got entangled in a fantasy of a never-ending love story.

Finding a best friend in your husband is much easier and better than searching for your husband in your best friend. Being the best of friends actually entails having no secrets and disclosing all our weaknesses from the early days itself.

Marriage to a best friend, while often seen as an idyllic union, does come with its own set of challenges. One such challenge lies in the intimate knowledge that a best friend-turned-spouse possesses about us. They are privy to our vulnerabilities, our insecurities, and our deepest fears. This level of familiarity, while comforting in many ways, can also be a double-edged sword.

In the realm of relationships, this intimate knowledge can sometimes be wielded as a tool for manipulation. Knowing our weaknesses, a spouse who was once a confidant may inadvertently or even deliberately exploit these vulnerabilities. It's not always a conscious act, but rather a consequence of this intimate bond.

The compromise, then, becomes a frequent visitor in the corridors of matrimony. We find ourselves at times yielding to requests or acquiescing in disagreements not out of genuine agreement, but rather as a result of a desire to maintain the harmony that is so cherished in a marriage. This delicate dance of balancing between the familiarity of friendship and the responsibilities of marriage can lead to moments of self-reflection and introspection.

Of course, the expectation scale rises with the sudden surge of emotions and then we are let down with no love in the air to inhale and survive.

Believe Me! It took no time for me to realize, and my senses awakened the very next week after our Grand Wedding.

The minutes were struggling to pass while I was gathering the pieces of my dreams and self. The overflow of the 'River Tears' was actually washing away every desire of mine, and my lips kept whispering "I Regret, I Regret." My wet eyelashes were dying to paint my pain on the canvas of my heart, but I could not convince myself where to begin, as the drama of my life was focusing on multiple elements mingling at a time.

My eyes were witnessing him changing and revealing his true colors;
My ears were enduring his greediness;
My nose could not bear the smell of his betrayal,
And my skin was grappling with his violence.

All emotions were vanishing in the mist of false promises, and we were parting at the speed of countless miles per second.

In the beginning, the surge of emotions had created a sense of euphoria, blurring the lines of reality. The grand wedding had been a spectacle, a culmination of dreams and aspirations. However, as the days unfolded, so did the truth. The cracks began to appear, and the weight of my decision pressed upon me. It was a painful awakening, a collision of expectations and reality.

My soul might have convinced my heart to vow spiritually with a stranger and love to spend a few months exploring him, but the tragedy of my voyage was that the boat I chose to sail forever was very dear to me as a best friend, whom I later discovered was merely a rusted one.

I wanted to escape from such a prison, but my steps were frozen with the thoughts of belonging to an Indian family, and that too from one of the strongest and most conservative households. No matter even if a hurricane strikes us down, we females are not supposed to let down our wedlock crown.

Then came the moment of clarity and I found the strength to break free from this whirlwind of a relationship. My Mom, my constant source of strength, understood my pain as only a woman could. With her unwavering support and understanding, I managed to keep from being drowned in a pool of fear and tears. But let's face it, so many of us are still stuck in the loop of convincing, compromising, and consoling. It's like a never-ending rollercoaster ride!

While my story may be a specific example, it's a reflection of a broader truth that many of us battle with when navigating the complexities of intimate relationships.

It's the story of every silly heart who gets infatuated with besties to be their soulmates.

* Love has no parameter, but respect is the only tool to measure its depth.
* Love yourself sincerely and allow your heart to blossom only.

I do agree, marrying a best friend is a beautiful notion, but it's important to remember that being a great friend doesn't automatically ensure compatibility as life partners.

The transition from friendship to romance brings forth a new set of dynamics and expectations. Quirks that were endearing in a friend may be slightly different in a partner. While marrying a best friend can lead to unparalleled comfort and understanding, it requires open communication, willingness to adapt, and a recognition that roles will evolve. Embracing this change with realism and optimism can pave the way for a future filled with love and mutual respect.

Every partner should cherish the best friend bond even in the role of a spouse. Patience, open communication, and understanding are key. Should actively listen, show affection, and support partner's  aspirations. Quality time, surprises, and gestures of kindness keep the romance alive. Above all, honesty and teamwork in facing challenges strengthen the foundation of their enduring partnership.

In the end, finding your best friend in your spouse can be an incredible blessing. It's a union that combines the comfort of camaraderie with the depth of romantic connection. Remember, a perfect match doesn't mean flawless, but rather two imperfect souls perfectly complementing each other's journey through life.

However, it's vital to recognize that being best friends isn't enough. It's equally crucial to ensure that your partner is ready to elevate the relationship to this new level of intimacy and commitment.

It takes more than familiarity to create a symphony. It requires harmony, commitment, and a shared dedication to compose a lasting love story.

Let's conclude with this timeless wisdom: "In the end, it's not about finding someone you can live with, but someone you can't imagine living without."

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