Night Shift [h.s]

fifteen

☁️ HARRY ☁️

Lana was slowly heading back to her usual self. I had been watching her so closely over the past couple of days and I didn't really care how creepy that may sound, she was on my mind every second of the day, she was in my dreams, she was quite literally everywhere. I just couldn't get her off of my mind, from the moment I met her to nearly six weeks on from that very day. She still clouded my every thought. But I had been keeping a close eye on her just recently, I was worried about her and I felt as though the least I could do was to just keep a watchful eye on her to make sure she was okay.

Over the past few days she had seemed a lot more like herself, I had noticed every little detail about her, from the way that she had started braiding her hair for shifts again, wearing more makeup, looking more presentable and being a little more cheerier around other staff. Something had changed, I wasn't sure what it was, but something was different about her.

It must've just been some sort of cold or virus, maybe she had been on her period after all. It probably wasn't anything to worry about, the main point was that she seemed somewhat on the mend, there was just something missing. Something that felt such a mammoth part of it all.

Lana had been avoiding me. There was no question about it. She had been completely avoiding me and she'd probably deny it, but there was no denying that she was avoiding me like the plague.

I had convinced myself yesterday, on the fourth day of her blatantly refusing to even hold a simple conversation, I told myself that she hated me. There was no other option I could've thought of to make this all make sense. I didn't understand what had shifted between us so suddenly and why she was itching to get away from me every time I stopped to ask how she was or even just sent a smile her way. Every time she awkwardly shuffled herself into a cubicle or ran off somewhere. I hadn't even held a proper conversation with her over the past three days. Every time I tried, I was shut down immediately.

She was making this all incredibly hard. I was trying to push forwards, I was trying to make moves and she wasn't budging. Not even an inch. I couldn't even ask how her day was without her awkward stuttering and desperateness to get away from me. Anybody would think that I was the bad guy. Anybody would assume that I had done something unforgivable. I don't think I had, I had been trying to rack my brain trying to think of ways that I may have upset her, I was trying to figure out what I might've said that could've offended her but every time I thought long and hard about it, I came up with nothing. I was empty handed.

I was left just as confused as ever after every shift. I found it hard to even lull myself to sleep when it was playing on my mind so much. I couldn't figure out what had gone so horrible wrong to the point where Lana couldn't even bare to talk to me.