Night Shift [h.s]

thirty seven

☁️ ALANNAH ☁️

Harry was able to get out of the ICU a day or two later after proving to the doctors that he absolutely could breathe on his own and he could manage it as well. He was still in need of a little oxygen, but the doctors were happy enough to send him on his way to a normal ward and I don't think I had ever been so relieved when I had heard the doctors say those words.

It was one step closer to coming home and that's all I could focus on. That's the only place my mind was at. I just couldn't stop thinking about finally bringing Harry home and getting to have him with us where I knew he was safe and Harmony could see him and we didn't have to abide by stupid visiting hours that were really beginning to get on my nerves. I wanted to see Harry at all hours of the day, I didn't want to be restricted. Although, the nurses on the ward had been a little lenient with the visiting hours considering that Harry was one of the hospitals own and he had a private room, not only that, but Niall, Rosie and I could technically visit whenever we wanted because we were also staff, though it just depended who was working on the ward. There were some nurses who were not so kind about it.

I had felt a lot more relaxed with Harry on the ward now, especially considering he wasn't being kept alive with machines anymore and he didn't have a million and one different medications being pumped into him. He was mostly just on pain medication now and that was a huge step from where he was just over a week ago now.

It helped a lot that Harry was now awake for the majority of the day and since being off of the sedatives for a week now, he could clearly hold a conversation and he could actually tell me how he was feeling and what hurt, he was able to voice that now and that settled my heart a lot more to know that he wasn't in constant pain. He had aches and moments where he was in discomfort for sure, but whenever I asked him, he never seemed to be in immense pain and that was the biggest relief for me.

It seemed slightly crazy how far he had come in about eleven days now. Eleven days ago I was so sure I was going to lose him, I was certain that it was the end and I'd have to carry on this life alone. I had visions of me raising Harry's child whilst he couldn't fight anymore and it tore my heart apart. Though slowly but surely, through each day, I felt as though my heart was patching up a little more. I think it would take a while to fully heal from the crazy rollercoaster of trauma I had been through over the past week or so, but for now, I just had to focus on the positives and the fact that Harry was okay. He hadn't had any regressions, he's had no infections and that was really something to hold onto.

I was looking for the positives in every day and being able to just talk to Harry and know that he's okay was something that healed my heart a lot quicker than I thought it would. I still could hardly rest at night as flashes of Harry being brought into the ED with blood smothered over his chest and his heart rate flashing on the screen at a dangerous level. Every time I closed my eyes it was like I had to relive it all over again, but I was hoping that was something that would ease with time.