Pumpkin Eater

Otober 14th

It was supposed to be the happiest place on Earth....

That's what the sign said anyway.

That's what all the commercials on tv said.

That's what the radio said.

That's even what the millions of previous guests had said....but it was all a lie.

It wasn't the happiest place on Earth at all - but the deadliest.

At least it was that day.....

You were there with your girlfriend, Billie Eilish.

It was your one year anniversary.

You had met on the It's a small world boat ride, and that's were Billie wanted to go first thing!

To recreate the magical moment you two first met on celebrity night, last year.

The one night a year were all Disney parks are reserved solely for celebrities and their guests only.

That was the day the ride broke down and you were stuck in the boat for three hours.

Billie Eilish, her bodyguard, and her friends were in the boat right in front of yours.

You were a nobody.

Just an heir to Walt Disney.

You were in a boat with your 3 year old little sister who was too scared to ride alone.

Your parents had gone to toon town with your 5 year old brother.

Your little sister started crying that she had to use the bathroom - just ten minutes after the ride broke down.

Thirty minutes in she was sobbing about how she was about to pee in her brand new princess dress.

That's when one of Billie's friends turned around and said she could help your sister use the bathroom.

You assumed she was going to hop out of the boat and swim to shore with her or something, but she nudged Billie and told her to hand over her backpack.

Billie did, and her friend grabbed a reusable water bottle out if it and dumped whatever was in it in the water beside the boat, before handing it back for your sister to pee in.

You didn't want your sister to pee in the nice sparkly bottle but Billie said she didn't mind.

That she had a thousand more just like them packed in boxes at her merch warehouse.

Your sister asked Billie if she could go to her merch warehouse and get some more sparkly bottles and Billie said sure.

After a few minutes of chatting back and forth your sister decided she wanted Billie as her big sister.

So she jumped into her boat.

Then she ended up falling asleep on Billie's lap and slept for almost 2 hours until you were all finally evacuated from the broken ride.

She was too tired to walk, so Billie carried her around the park that night.

You exchanged numbers - for playdates with your little sister of course- but it wasn't long before you and Billie started hanging out together without your sister.

Then you just started dating.

For your one year anniversary, the two of you got to ride it's a small world alone together.

Thankfully the ride didn't get stuck this time.....but the submarine ride did.

You were pissed at first - after all - you're the heir to the Disney fortune - you deserve the finest treatment!