Castles in the Sky

˙⋆ If You Ever Read This ⋆˙

If you ever find this collection

Know that I wrote it for myself.

If you remember anything about me,

I hope it's that writing is the only way I process things,

That poetry is the only way I heal and find my peace,

That penning my thoughts is the only way I know how to fix a broken heart.

If you ever read this collection,

Know that I didn't share it to hurt you.

If you remember anything about me

Please let it be why I post my writing:

That it's for the shadow girl who feels so alone,

Who needs someone to say she isn't crazy.

If you ever stumble upon this collection,

Know that I never intended to paint you as a villain.

If you still know anything about me,

It should be that I wrote this to release the version of you that I created,

That I wrote this to say goodbye to that chapter of Us,

That I wrote this so I could finally—finally—understand myself.

If you need to know anything about me,

I pray it's that you recognize not all of this is about you.

So many of these poems are about you,

But not all of them.

Some are about Her,

Some are about other Him's,

Some are about Them,

But too many are about Me.

If you could know anything about me,

Know that I never expected you to find this.

I don't expect you to follow my platforms,

To keep up with my writing,

To check up on me through social media. 

If I could tell you one more thing,

It's that this is not about what you did to me

Or even what I did to you.

This is one girl's journey through her own shadow fold.

This is about how one girl fell into bitter shadows

And survived to tell the tale.

This is about every shadowy thought that plagued me for over a year,

And how I dealt with the pain of You.

This is about something so much bigger than You and I

And what we lost.