One Shots SJ & EO x daugther

- Its okay part 2 - SJ

Name: Lea Kayle Johansson
Age: 18
School: X

Parents: Scarlett Johansson (mother) and Colin Jost (step-dad)
Siblings: Rose (9), Cosmo (2)

Plot summary: A year after our failed suïcide attempt. How is life now? (Be sure to read the first part :) )

REQUESTED BY: Jaquelynn13 , marvelfav05 , EmSnape
> hope y'all like this <3 I know it's been months since part one, sorry for that.

1246 Words :)

TW: Talks about suicide, relapse: blade, blood > self-harm (sorry)

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Lea POV

It's been like a year since I woke up in the hospital. 

It's been a year since I hurt my mom, stepdad, and siblings. 

it's been a year since I gave up.

But I got a second chance, and I'm failing again. I mean, sure I'm going to therapy and I'm really trying but lately I feel like I'm back at square one. 

Mom and I decided that it wasn't a good idea for me the go to college, so we've postponed that. I was working in the cute little cafe but I got fired today. They didn't even give me a good reason. 

I mean, I knew I wasn't worth it or good at it but still. It hurts a lot. At least give me a good reason.  I feel like everything I worked so hard for to go away is back now. 

I mean, look at me. I'm sitting on the edge of my bath with a new blade in my hand. It's already pressed against my skin. The only thing I have to do is draw it across it.

I'm seven months clean. I should be better. I shouldn't want to do it. 

I deserve it.

I deserve the pain, the scar, the weird looks from people when they see my arms. 

I press the blade a little harder against my skin. I feel the sharpest point of the blade slit open my skin. At this point, I lose all reality, all doubt. I hold it a little better and draw a horizontal line.

One. Move the blade

Two. Move the blade again

Three move the blade

Four, How about a diagonal cut?

Five Let's make the next one a little bigger

Six I can do a deeper

Seven deeper and wider equals more pain

Eight I deserve this

Nine Just one more

Ten. Let's move on to my other arm

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..

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''Lea?'' The voice of my mom makes me stop. I look at my arms and see all the damage I've done. Tears well in my eyes as I turn my head to meet my mother's eyes. She looks at me with a soft, loved expression.