Slippery Eel times 2! Alenoah

Chapter Twelve

(Warning: mentions of abuse and emotional abuse)

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Noah lays in his bed. He still feels terrible after what happened. Memories of his childhood start to come back. The very memories that he wanted gone. He hates feeling like this. Vulnerable and helpless. It reminds him of how he felt when he was still living with his parents.

As soon as he got the contract for the show he immediately signed it. He didn't care whether he got hurt or not, he just didn't want to be at home. He was thankful that when he was eliminated, he didn't have to go home, he got to stay with Chris. It really wasn't that bad honestly. Better than home.

Noah has eight older sisters, who are all moved out, and two recently divorced parents. All of his older sisters were either moved out or in college by the time that he was born. So all he had was his parents. But they didn't care about him. Not one bit. Especially not his father. His mother didn't pay any attention to him and acted like he never existed while his father also didn't pay much attention to him unless he did something that angered his father.

His parents fought all the time. Noah would just go into his room and cry while he had to hear them scream at each other. He doesn't blame his sisters for barely coming to see him. Not when his parents are like this. But, it would have been nice to at least see them once a year. More specifically on his birthday. But that never happened.

When Noah first went to school, he didn't make any friends at all. Why would he? He had no reason too. Plus his father would just get mad at him again if he expressed too many emotions to someone.

He remembers numerous times where his father would hit him and yell at him for being happy or sad or mad. He remembers how he had to bottle all of his emotions deep down inside him for no one else to see. It was hard at first, trying to ignore all feelings and pushing them down. But, it slowly got easier. Until one day when he was seven, he forgot all about his emotions and only wanted to make his father and mother at least look at him with an expression other than disgust. He would always be at the top of his class, no matter what it was, and he would always get one hundred percent on everything he did. But no matter what he did, he never got what he truly wanted.

Once he got an A+ on his history test and he made the mistake of smiling in front of his father. The next day he wore baggy clothes, making sure that no one saw the bruises and cuts inflicted on him.

He was so tired, tired of feeling like he didn't matter, tired of feeling like he will never be loved by anyone. Until he signed up for Total Drama.

On the show, he made friends that made him feel like he was worth something. He will never regret the day that he met, Owen, Eva, Izzy, and Courtney.

He smiles at the thought of them. He feels amazing when he's around them. He's not tired at all. Then again there's also Chef and Chris. They make him feel like he's loved as well. Chris may kidnap him from time to time but he doesn't mind. It feels nice to have people that do care for him around.

But that night. With Justin and Alejandro. Filled Noah up with so many emotions that he couldn't even count. He hates it when that happens. When his just suddenly feels so many emotions all at once that it's hard to keep track of them all. All of which... hurt.... It feels like he's being stabbed by multiple knives all at the same time.

But, as long as he ignores them all, he'll be fine.

...right?