"And lastly, that's Madison, or Mads, my little sister who is also trying to climb up the broken lifeguard tower. We're only a year apart. When she's not doing some odd job for extra cash she is on the HMS Pogue with the rest of us. Most loyal perso...
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Madison stood in the shower, letting the hot water wash over her body. They had finally found the gun, she had found the gun, and for the first time in months she could see the true pride in JJ's eyes. This was exactly what they needed to bring John B home and everything they had been through didn't matter anymore because it was all worth it. The tears, the fights, the desperation, none of it mattered because he was going to be able to come home. Him and Sarah would be home and everything would be right in her world again. She'd have her brother back, JJ would have his best friend back, and there wouldn't be a gaping hole missing from the Pogues anymore. The four of them were finally hopeful, genuine smiles on their faces, and excitement buzzing around them...until they weren't.
She stood there until the water ran cold and even then it took her a second to realize she had run out of hot water. Turning the water off, she opened the shower curtain, and grabbed the last clean towel from under the sink. She would have to do laundry again soon but everything in the house had fallen by the wasteside recently though now there really wasn't any reason to hurry to clean it wasn't like John B would be home anytime soon.
She threw on one of JJ's t-shirts and a pair of pajama pants because all she wanted to be right now was as physically comfortable as possible because mentally she was exhausted. She ran the brush through her hair a few times but ultimately threw it up in a messy bun. She stood there with her hand on the door knob, the metal cool against her skin, as she thought about what was next. They had lost their chance of bringing him home and while she had almost just drowned it also made her realize that she didn't actually want to die but it didn't stop the overwhelming feeling of being defeated.
There was nothing else she could do and as she stepped out into the hallway she saw her friends talking quietly. She had let them all down. She had let Sarah down. She had let her brother down. The gun wasn't enough. Shoupe had all but pushed them out of Peterkin's office, the office he was only sitting in because of the gun they left on his desk, her name still on the glass door a reminder that even killing a cop wasn't enough to bring a Kook down.
She hadn't noticed they stopped talking or the fact that Pope had nudged JJ and motioned to her in the hallway until the blonde was standing right in front of her, making her jump as she snapped out of her thoughts.
"Hey, shortcake, how you feeling?" He tucked a stray hair behind her ear, his fingertips barely brushing the side of her face. She forced a smile at the nickname she hadn't heard in awhile but otherwise kept quiet. She wasn't really sure how to answer. She was clean so she supposed that was something and she was doing everything she could not to fall back into that dark place but right now she was just numb. He gently took her arm in his hand, the cut already turning a bright red around the edges. "We need to get this cleaned out. Who knows what was in that shit."
Madison nodded and tried to break the awkward tension, "Do you think a worm got in there?"
"Don't think you have the right parts for that, baby," he winked, trying to keep the light hearted conversation going so she wouldn't get too lost in that beautiful head of hers again but the image of her on the pavement, her not breathing, not knowing if he was ever going to be able to look into her eyes again would forever be ingrained in his mind. "Come on."
