Chapter 3

115 7 0
                                    

*There will be mentions of rape. Please read with caution.*

Seungmin P.O.V

After we finished filling out the police report, everyone left. Chan was noticeably upset but I couldn't come up with anything to calm him down. He was pacing back and forth in the living room. His footsteps were completely silent. My heartbeat rose at the sight of him. He only began to calm down when he saw that he was scaring me. He sat down on the couch and patted the spot beside him.

"Come sit down with me baby." I nodded and walked toward him. He wrapped his arms around my waist and laid his head against my stomach. His next words came out in a whisper. "I'm sorry." I chuckled.

"Don't be. It's me who should apologize. I feel like this had something to do with those messages I got yesterday." Chan pulled me beside him and laid his head on my chest. There was one thing I had noticed over the last few years. When his behavior made me nervous, he would hold me. It was like his way of making sure that I knew he wasn't angry with me. When he first found out about my anxiety around him, he couldn't understand. To be fair, I couldn't understand why I was either. He reminded me on a daily that I was safe with him but whenever he was angry, that side of me came out. I hated that I did it. He was supposed to be the person I felt the safest with but he was also the person that I was scared of.

"Stop thinking so hard, baby. There is nothing to worry about. The police will catch him and that will be the end of it." I heard his words but I knew there was something he wasn't telling me. I could hear it in his voice. He was sure I knew it too.

"Hyung, why don't we call the guys over and eat some food together? Maybe it will get our minds off of it for a while. I don't want to tell them though. There is no reason to bring them into it unless it affects them too." He nodded.

"I want to ask you something first."

"What is it?"

"Why did you pass out earlier?" Should I tell him the truth? What would be the consequences if I did? Would he be disgusted? Would he hate me? Would he still love me? I didn't know any of those questions. I had spent my whole life running from the truth. I was exhausted from it but if I told him or anyone, it would be the end. I felt disgusted with myself just thinking about it. "Seungmin, tell me the truth. Please." I stood and moved to the floor.

"I told you that I didn't remember any of my childhood other than the fact that I went mute." He nodded, keeping his distance. A tear slid down my face as I thought about my past. He frowned but didn't move any closer to me. "My dad dying wasn't the only reason I went mute." He wiped the tears that escaped my eyes.

"Baby, what happened to you?"

"I was... raped a few weeks after he died." As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I regretted it. He froze and stared at me for a long moment. Every part of me wanted to run but I didn't. I sat there and waited for him to say something. He never did though. He stood up and left. I didn't see him again that night. All I could do was cry myself to sleep. I hated myself for telling him. I felt completely disgusted and that thought only made me cry even more.

***********************

Well, I really did not intend to make this book so dark. I'm sorry guys. I hope you enjoyed it. Please leave your thoughts in the comments. Also, let me remind you guys that it is just a fanfic. Anyway, bye bye lovelies.

-Thea

Beyond the Camera Where stories live. Discover now