Seungmin P.O.V
It'd been 4 days since we got to the hotel. It was pretty quiet in the room. Chan had a lot in his head. We had said much since we got here. He still wasn't over hurting me. He said he was, but I knew that wasn't true. I could tell because he didn't want to touch me. I mean, he did the first night but that was because I asked him to. Since then, he hasn't. It's like he felt disgusted. Usually, I would be angry. I would fight back but I didn't have the energy or the patience. God, how did things end up this way? Just two weeks ago, our best friends were getting married and now we were sitting in a hotel room not even able to look at each other. The worst of it all was that Chan wouldn't even touch me. I hadn't realized I'd gotten so addicted to his touch till now. It was like I was in withdrawal. I didn't know if I wanted to cry, yell, or hit him. Actually, I wanted to do all three right now. I sat up and got off the bed. He glimpsed at me but didn't say anything. It was like we were strangers all over again. I hated it. I never wanted so badly to walk away from him. I was hurting, I was angry. How could that bastard do this to me after all these years? I don't even know what I did to him. What could possibly make him hate me so much? He took everything from me. Why did he want to take Chan from me too? I sighed and left the bathroom. Chan was sitting on the bed when I came out. I walked to the other side of the bed and sat down. He still didn't speak. I only became more angry. I was the one in danger. I was the one that he hurt. Why was I getting the silent treatment? Why was he not comforting me? Why wasn't he holding me and telling me that everything would be okay? I huffed in frustration. Only then did he finally look up at me.
"What's wrong, Seungmin?" My anger exploded then.
"What's wrong with me? We've been locked up in here for four days and you've barely touched me let alone talked to me. Don't you realize that by doing this, you're giving him what he wants? He wants to take everything from me. You're letting him win without even trying. Of course, I'm fucking angry. We've been through hell to get where we are and you're acting like we're strangers. You're acting the way you used to. Why? You haven't put your hands on me like that for 4 years. What the fuck is wrong with you. I've been in love with you for almost 7 years. I've watched you change. I've watched you become a better person. You're not him anymore. You're not that abusive asshole anymore. Get your shit together. You promised me the world. You told me that you would burn it down for me if it would save me. For the love of God, stop treating me like I'm nothing to you. I've put up with everything. I forgave you for everything. I even got over you sleeping with Leeknow Hyung. I have given you my everything. What the fuck did I do to you that made the way you're treating me right now." I only realized I was crying after I finished my rant. I wiped the tears from my eyes and looked away. Chan stayed quiet for a long time. After all of my pent up anger came out, I felt better. It was weird but I thought Chan relaxed a little at my words.
"Seungmin." I looked back at him.
"What?"
"I love you. Never change." I raised a brow.
"That's what you got from all of the shit I just said?"
"I'm sorry that I've been acting so distant. You're right. I'm not that abusive asshole anymore. I'm just scared for you. It took me so long to become worthy of your love. The reason I haven't touched you is because I'm still angry. I'm really sorry. I slept with you the other night because you asked me to. I'm not going to touch you if you don't want me to." I raised a brow.
"Are you stupid? You really think I don't want you to touch me? I have an addiction to you. My skin is basically burning, I'm craving you so bad." He chuckled and pulled me into his lap.
"I'm sorry, baby." I shook my head and rubbed against his leg a bit.
"Mmm."
"You feel better?" I nodded with a smile.
"I do. You're not allowed to not touch me."
" Noted." His phone went off then. He picked it up and frowned.
"Hyungnim is on the way." I nodded.
"Let's stay like this for a while."
"I'm all yours. However, if you keep rubbing my leg like that, you're gonna pay later."
"I need the distraction."
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Well, that's it for this chapter. I love you, guys. Thank you for reading.
-Thea
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Beyond the Camera
FanfictionThe second book in the camera series A Chanmin story This story takes place after Behind the Camera and cannot be read as a stand-alone. Seungmin has a tough time adjusting to the new normal along with his past catching up to him. Chan does his be...