destroy yourself

trying to help

After I agree that with myself I try and stick with it at all times. When I walk past him in the corridors I keep my head down or turn the other direction.

I few days pass of me not speaking with him when I decide to go to the library. I'm sitting there reading my book when I feel a tap on my shoulder.

"Hey, I don't know what the matter is but why are you ignoring me, no offence but we need to do this assignment." Harry says this so calmly and lovingly it's hard to hate him and not to blush like an idiot.

I don't know what to do I don't know what to say.

"I- i- I'm sor-" my voices goes all high pitched and wobbly so I stop myself from saying anymore

I try so hard not to cry. My father always told me crying is for weak men. But I couldn't help it tears started streaming down my face faster and heavier. why here, why with potter here!?

I look up and just see harry there staring at me with pain and almost guilt in his eyes. He doesn't say anything but just stands looking over me. I don't know  what he's going to do.

"Don't you need something, I can help, please tell me"

I just stay crying

"Please, I can he-"

"Please just go away, I want to be alone!" I hiss back trying not to brake my voice or sob. All I hear are his steps slowly walking away after he says nothing. My face is buried into my arms as I start to wonder mabye I did want him to stay

~~~~~~

It's late so no ones in the corridors and I finally catch up to him.

"Poter! Potter wait!!"

He stops and turns around quickly like he was expecting me.

"I'm sorry I told you to go away, I'm dealing with things right now and I guess my way to deal with it is to hide and hope it goes away."

"It's okay, I get it, I do it to. I guess it just feels easier in some ways." He pauses and looks down at my hand.

"How did that happen?" He askes

I forgot about my knuckles and that it looked like a won an extreme boxing match.

"Right yeah, that, I was walking into my dorm and I triped and fell. Smacked my fists into the wall to try stop myself." Honestly I'm impressed how fast I come up with this.

I don't think harry believes me though as when I look back up from examining my hands he looks sort of disappointed in me for lying to him. Like somehow he knew.

Then something happens so out the blue I didn't think would happen in a million years.

He huggs me.

In the middle of the corridor right outside the gryffindor common room. He just embraces me and I sink into him for a second and I think be realises cause he then backs away and a slight smile is plaster on his face.

"All I'm saying draco is I'm here. I don't know all your struggles but I know some. Goodnight."

And with that he left.

~~~~~~

I lay in bed and start smiling to myself like a freak. He hugged me. Oh merlins beard he hugged me! This is so crazy. I don't even realise till now he also called me draco.

I get butterflies in my stomach and I roll onto my side and can't stop smiling. I've fallen. I've fallen hard.

-598 words.