𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐈𝐯𝐲 𝐓𝐫𝐢𝐨

Thomas [3]

Contains smut and struggles with body image etc

Today was just not a good day, I was just feeling down. As soon as I woke up this morning, I was already putting myself down. Looking in the mirror in my room, I mentally pointed out everything wrong with myself.

I let out huff of air I didn't know was being held in my lungs and moved on with my day. I sat at the table for breakfast, messing with the food on my plate. I haven't had an appetite the past couple of days, and today wasn't anything different. I could see Newt giving me worried glances, but I decided to ignore them.

Thomas had left me this morning with a quick kiss, before rushing out the door of our hut. Minho and him had been so busy trying to get us out of here that he has been distant. I have been getting in my head a lot lately because of it. I was telling myself that he doesn't want me anymore, he isn't attracted to me anymore.

"Y/n, can you hear me?" I was ripped from my thoughts by a certain British boy next to me.

"Oh, yeah, sorry I was spacing out."

"Obviously," he laughed lightly, "are you feeling okay?" His eyebrows scrunched together in a worried manner.

"Yeah, I'm good. I was just thinking about something." He gave me a nod, but I could tell he didn't really believe me. I decided that I was just going to get to work early so I could get off early.

"Here, Chuck, I'm not hungry," I pushed my plate towards him and he accepted it gratefully.

"Bye guys." I spoke quietly before getting up and walking towards the med-jack hut.

"Hey, Clint," I put on my best mask, just so I can make it through the day.

"Hey, Y/n! Today is an easy day we just need to catch up on inventory, unless some shuckface hurts themselves." Him and I both laughed a little.

"Okay, I'll just get started on inventory." He gave me a simple nod before I walked away. I walked into the supply closet and began counting and writing down the number of each item.

A couple of hours later, Clint and Jeff approached me, "You ready to go grab lunch?" I gently shook my head. "I'm not really hungry right now. Just go without me. I'll finish up here, okay?"

"Okay, are you sure?" Jeff asked. I nodded my head yes and they moved on, not looking into it.

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Before I knew it I was done with inventory. "Hey guys, I finished is there anything else I need to do?"

"No, you're all good. I know there isn't that much to the work day left, but go ahead and take the rest of the day off." I smiled at his kindness. "Okay, thank you! I'll see you guys later." They nodded their heads and offered gentle smiles.

As I stepped out of the med-jack I let the mask fall.

I made it to Thomas and I's hut and collapsed onto the bed. I could hear my stomach growling, but I was worried I would start to gain weight. I've noticed the changes in my body, and I felt like I was gaining weight. The stretch marks and cellulite on my hips only solidified the idea that I had.

The familiar burn of tears lingered in my eyes. Unfortunately, I couldn't stop them from falling. As much as I tried to, it didn't work. I was worried for my relationship. When he wasn't running or on the map room with Minho, he wouldn't even spend time with me. He would sometimes come to bed late and when I would try to cuddle up to him and kiss him he wouldn't even try to reciprocate. Because of the way he was acting towards me, only made me think the thoughts in my heard were true.