Forms of peace

𝟏𝟓

[TW] Slight mentions of abuse, scars and nudity

...༻❁🝮❁༺...
The sound of the clock ticking seemed louder than usual as you stared at your older sister with wide eyes
"you didnt tell neither aki-san or hatake about your plans?"

Mei looked at your worried face and notice your red nose and puffy eyes "have you been cry-"

"oh mei, you just made things so much worse for aki-san" your face softened
"what do you mean? Hes one of the highest lords in the village hidden in the sand society surely he'll find another wife"

"today is our last day here, the day you are to be married to him. Do you understand what cancelling a marriage now will inflect on him?"

Mei looked clueless of her actions "you couldve told him two days earlier which is still bad but the best you could've done at that time, the day before would be bad but today is worse"

"making him wait until the marriage just for you to cancel it then is a horrible thing to do. To humiliate him on the day that should've one of the happiest in his life is horrible."

You sighed as you recalled a few words he spoke to you before
"women are the most precious creations of god, they are the symbol of beauty and it should stay that way everywhere in the world"

"i am not saying you should regret cancelling the marriage but you should regret the timing to announce the cancelling"

You stared at mei right into the eyes and started speaking again "you should be ashamed for humiliating such a wonderful man, i do not know how much you know of him but i at the very least know that he is the complete opposite from all those scums in konoha! He is a respectful man who admires women attractive or not instead of giving them dirty looks if they're not attractive to him and lustful looks if they are"

You turned around to fully face her and mei saw your truly angered look
"aki-san is a man who loves unconditionally no matter your future or your past he will love you as in you in the present and he would certainly kneel before you if he wishes to marry you! Unlike those ridiculous men in konoha he believes that women are the most beautiful creations of god and should be taken care of like a piece no matter if they are strong women or not"

"if he ever see's a woman he doesnt find attractive he will simply pass by her and smile at her as a kind gesture or just treat her normally because he knows that somewhere else in this world someone will find her attractive and it doesnt have to be him! He wont laugh at her looks or create rumours about her!"

"aki-san see's beauty in everyone and everything and i can prove that to you because he managed to find it in me! Me! The ugly okkotsu that is known to be evil or cursed in konoha! I will not stand here and let you pass on when you tell me that even when i told you two days earlier that you shouldve talked to him about it and now suddenly you dont tell him anything and its the day of your marriage! Such a thing i will not accept especially if you're to be married to such a wonderful man as him!"

Mei furrowed her eyebrows "how about you marry him then? It sounds you like him a lot!"
You laughed

"i wont marry him, because you know why? Im not gonna marry a man when i love another! I will not marry a man i never truly loved! I wont give him high hopes for a future with me in it when its not gonna happen! I am a bad person yet i have the decency to acknowledge that!"

"and you know what? He proposed to me? And you know what i did? I refused because i do not love him and i dont think i ever will! At least in a romantic way! And even if i did i would still refuse because as i said i am a bad person and he doesnt deserve such a violent woman like me when he is one of the sweetest men i know! I am not in a good place mentally as well and i want to find out who i am and take decisions later on because right now i dont know who i am!"

Mei stood up "you cannot speak of my acts involving marriage when you've barely even done anything like that! You know you're a bad person and thats honestly true because you are here yelling at me for things that are supposed to be my choice!"

You stood up as well and glared at her "im yelling at you because you are gonna most likely ruined the image of women on a man who see's them as nothing but good! And im so upset about it exactly for that reason, it is rare for me to see such a man so i want his views to never change for the sake of the women who actually love him!"

"i know more than you what its like to feel unloved and humiliated, you've even made me feel those two things many times before. And i do not want aki-san to feel that way because i dont want him to end up like me!"

"he is like an innocent child which is what i was before you and practically everyone else surrounding me ruined me and turned me into a bad person because of your views and decisions!"

"there is consequences to your actions and and me being who i am now is the consequence to many of yours!"

At this point, tears started brimming in your eyes as this was truly personal to you

"and you dare to speak about me avoiding to interact with men which is one of the reasons why i havent found love yet, you dare to speak of such a matter when you know exactly why! You especially because you were always there watching with a bored expression as if it never bothered you but suddenly when someone finds out about it you have tears in your eyes and you speak of how bad you feel for me!"

"you dont know how it feels to look at yourself in the mirroir and stare at your scars in disgust!"
You loosened your yukata and it slipped to the floor, leaving you in only undergarments in front of your sister

"you never got to experience the pain of receiving these and the pain of remembering how they happened! You never got to experience that because you are pretty! And normally i wouldnt even hate on pretty people because they have done nothing wrong but when it comes to pretty people who are selfish and arrogant like you it makes my blood boil!"

Mei gasped when she saw the amount of scars littered around your body
You exhaled and calmed down a little

"tell me something mei, how did i get these scars? How old was i when i received them and what did i do?" your eyes went dull as you looked at her shake and sob at the image of your body

She stared at one specific scar, the one that started between your breasts and ended at your ribs

"father gave them to you... You were four to eight years old and i dont know... He always said it was because you were ugly and resembled him"

You laughed dryly

"you know, i look at myself and see the two people i hate most; myself and my dead excuse of a father."