Forms of peace

𝟒𝟎

...༻❁🝮❁༺...
You kneeled in front of a tombstone, a scarf around your neck and thick clothes on your body

The ground was covered with a thick layer of snow and even more was slowly falling
You exhaled, a cloud of frozen air leaving your lips

"Today I'm getting married" you spoke
Even in his death it was difficult to speak to him, was that normal? Or were you just being dramatic?

"I remember you saying you regretted having another child after already having seven because I got my looks from you" you tucked your hands under your haori as they started getting cold

"And sometimes I wonder if the reason you're so mad that I got your looks is because you hated how you looked... just like how I do with mine"

You reached your hand over to the stone and dusted off the snow that fell onto it
"But you know what?" You laughed dryly "the man I'm marrying is the leader of the clan you admire so much"

You smiled "his name is madara uchiha"
"He was originally supposed to marry Miya but... you know, and even then she cancelled their marriage because she wanted to focus on her goals"

"Did you see her again yet?"
Tears brimmed at your eyes and it was as if an imaginary wire wrapped itself around your throat, preventing you from speaking any further

"Everyday I wish that in another universe we could have a genuine and strong bond but"

"But- then I wonder, why not in this one?
You wiped your tears with the back of your hand and cleared your throat
"And you remember when you would complain about how I talked a lot? How I cried too much? How I was too kind?" You couldn't help the sobs that left your throat

"I- I changed, so that maybe once I meet you again you'll be able to look at me and see someone you're proud of but... he, madara uchiha managed to make me bring out who I really am without doing anything and- he accepts me for who I am"

"And anyone would wonder, how come the mighty madara uchiha accepts a woman who is completely against the beauty standards, is annoying, has the worst mood swings and is always either crying or yelling? That I don't know myself but he does, and I'm grateful for that because for once in my life I don't have to force myself to change"

"And, I always wondered if I'll ever be able to find love in this lifetime because all I want is to be loved yet I always want to be alone"

"But with him... it's like the line that always goes straight goes to the side, I found myself wanting to be alone with him. That doesn't make sense does it? But I don't have a clue on how to explain it."

"And you remember how you would call me delusional for wanting what's in the romance books I always read? The time I spend with him feels just like the moments in a book"

"So all I want, is for you to just send me a sign that you accept our marriage because even though mother isn't the source of all my trauma, she doesn't even think of me as her child anymore. But I know that you always will, because I know- I know that I remind you of yourself"

"And also because even though you caused all of my scars, when I think of you I think of when you would sit beside me at night and tell me to not stay up late yet you would spend all night telling me stories about your childhood, complaining to me about mother and how much you disliked her, I remember how I would always agree with you when you would complain and when I would tell you that you would rub my hair and laugh... really loud"

"Even though you are the reason why I don't like physical contact with men, all I've ever wanted... deep in my heart was just a hug from you"

"And I hate that I think so highly of you, I hate that you did all that to me even though I was just a kid- I hate the nights where you would come home drunk, I hate the times where you would yell at me and complain about how I was too much like you, i hate all of it... but mostly I hate the fact that I don't hate you, not even close, not even a little bit... not even at all" you sobbed

"And I'm afraid, afraid of the moment I get a child. I'll be just like you, all I want is to have a family, a family that is nothing like ours"

"Is that okay for me to want? Am I selfish for that?"

But then, you heard light footsteps. You looked around to try and find what it was yet you couldn't find it so your eyes trailed back to the tombstone. But there you saw a white and dark grey bunny

"Bunnies?" You sniffled as your tears stopped
The white one's tail wiggled as it rubbed its head against your knee
"Why did you guys come to me? Go on, go home" you gently pushed it away with your finger but it just kept on coming back while the dark one just sat there looking at its friend

The white bunny looked at you with its big, round eyes and your cheeks dusted pink
"You want me to bring you with me?" You asked as you rubbed its head
Your face went black "but I was just in the middle of crying over my dead dad"
You laughed dryly, and you picked the two bunnies up, bringing them to your chest

You stood up and started walking away without even telling your dad goodbye

But you had left a bottle of sake and a cup infront of the tombstone, but with the slight gust of a wind, the bottle fell and shattered into pieces

You looked at the broken pieces, did your dad finally stop drinking? Or was it Miya? You shook your head
No, Miya wouldn't waste alcohol like that

You looked away with a sweet smile on your face as you walked back to the uchiha estate
...🝮༻✽༺🝮...
Madara stared at your signature that was written on the marriage contract
He sighed in content and his muscles relaxed until the loud thumping from his window reached his ears

He turned around and saw a dove at the window, that means it must be from Hashirama
He opened the window and took the letter from the dove

'The day she tells you about her father on her on free will, will be the day I will accept you as her husband, until then dont expect me to respect your relationship with her'

Madara frowned, he was wrong, this was from Tobirama.

[AN] doodle