You're not alone

Chapter 6 - I missed you

Moiraine and Lan have a talk.

If it had been possible for Moiraine to take two steps at once, she would have done it. Yet, she almost ran upstairs, having only one thing on her mind – getting to her room. She felt like she could barely breathe, and it wasn't because she had had another argument with Anvaere – she was used to that. No, Lan's words were the reason for her trembling hands and her racing heartbeat. I'm her Warder. How was that possible? What had happened in Tar Valon? Why did he come to Cairhien? It couldn't have been a coincidence, right?

The woman of the Blue Ajah pushed the door to her room open, then took a deep breath while crossing the room. Light, this was insane!

She heard Lan entering the room and placing his bags beside the door, so she turned around. Her eyes wandered over him, taking him in like he was an illusion. For nights, she cried herself to sleep because she wished he would return to her. She would have given anything to talk to him for one last time, and now... now he was there, standing right in front of her and looking as stunning as always.

When Lan closed the door, Moiraine closed the distance between them. "Is it just me, or is your sister extremely careful toward strangers?"

The uncrowned king of Malkier turned to his bondholder when she reached him, and she allowed her body to take over. Her hands cupped his face and pulled it down to her. At the same time, her lips aimed for his.

Since it was a surprise to Lan, he couldn't react in time. His eyes widened when Moiraine's lips touched his. It was only for a moment, then she pulled back and let go of him. "Forgive me." Her hands were still trembling, and so was her voice. "I didn't mean to... I know you... it's just... I missed you." A tear rolled over her cheek, which she wiped away quickly. She wouldn't cry!

Lan watched her for a moment in complete silence like he needed to sort his thoughts, then his hands cupped Moiraine's face, and his lips covered hers in a heated kiss.

The Aes Sedai's body melted against his, her hands moving to his back to hold onto him. Light, she didn't want to let go of him!

After what felt like an eternity – but probably had only been a minute – Lan ended the kiss and leaned his forehead against hers. They both were out of breath. "Good," he breathed.

"Good?" Moiraine was confused. "Do you mean the kiss or-?"

"You confirmed my assumption."

"Your assumption? And what would that have been?"

Lan smiled and stole another kiss from his bondholder. "You just proved that you sent me to the White Tower with Nynaeve and Egwene to punish yourself and not because you suddenly couldn't stand me anymore."

The memory brought the tears back to Moiraine's eyes, so she turned her head away, but Lan pulled her face back to him and kissed her, then wrapped his arm around her waist to pull her even closer.

"I missed you," the uncrowned king of Malkier whispered against her lips. "For weeks, I can't think about anything other than pulling you into my arms again."

Lan's confession was Moiraine's undoing. She couldn't hold back her tears anymore. They rolled over her cheek uncontrollably and wet his tunic.

Tenderly, the uncrowned king of Malkier pressed a kiss on the woman's forehead, then wrapped his arms around her and held her while she sobbed against his chest.

Moiraine didn't know how long she was crying, but she felt weak when her tears finally subsided. Lan hadn't let go of her – not once. His strong arms were wrapped around her, holding her upright. One of his hands stroked her hair in calming movements, and – light! – it felt so good. She was back in that safety bubble only Lan's embrace could create for her. Of course, she felt safe around Siuan too, but it was a different kind of bubble.