Roommates (Sirius Black x reader)

Chapter 14 : Sticks

It had been about two weeks since the incident. I'm not quite sure what the incident was still but it must've been major. Sirius Black was being ignored by all three of us best lads, and no one would tell me why.

I took a neutral ground. Much to James's dismay. He had said something along the lines of, 'you cannot stay around Sirius. He's dangerous.' I simply told him that if he didn't want to tell me what happened then I couldn't take a side.

At lunch I still sat with the boys though. Sirius ate in the library alone. Lunch was a lot more quiet now. Remus looks in pain every day and James just seemed to be filled with anger.

I could tell all of them were missing him, Sirius. They hadn't smiled as much or laughed.

I look to James admiring him but not saying anything. He played around with his mashed potatoes.

James 3rd person pov :

James could feel y/n staring at him but he didn't want to look up. He was aware that she would want to start talking. Talking about how different all of them were being.

But they had every right to be?! What Sirius did... James look over to Remus. He put Remus's life at risk. He brought Snape to Remus before his transformation. They both could've died.

James had wondered what would've happened if he never stepped in. If he didn't drag Snape out in time. He shudders in thought of possibilities.

Remus had so much more to deal just because Sirius couldn't fight his temptations.

James thought about the future. The future with Sirius. What would come out of their friendship. Their brotherhood. They were four and now three. They were two, and now one.

A part of James knew that he would never ever in his entire life be able to forgive Sirius Black for what he had done. Yet another part of him already forgave him. The part of him still believing Sirius was his brother.

Y/n and Peter had left to get to their next class. Leaving James and Remus. "Let's go." Remus stands shaking James out of his thoughts.

They leave the great hall, silently. James looked at Remus. He had his hands stuffed in his pockets, nonchalantly walking.

All the feelings Remus Lupin had felt were locked up. James never knew how to access the key. With Sirius it was easy to talk about their feelings. About everything.

James sees Remus stop in his tracks. He looks forward to see Sirius. Sirius stood their for a second as well. James had wondered if Remus was going to say something but he hadn't.

He kept on walking passing by Sirius. James followed him walking slightly behind Remus. You would've never imagined a month ago they'd all been okay seeing this sight.

Remus had kept on walking as did James. Still silent not acknowledging the other's presence.

"You don't have to avoid him." Remus abruptly says. "I know you. I know you don't want too"

"Of course I want too. He deserves it." James fights back.

"James he's your best friend." Remus was soft with every word that came out of his mouth. Remus had intention with everything. He always thought about his words, like he had planned the conversation even before it occurred.

The others just spoke on feelings.

"Remus you are also my best friend."

Remus looks at James, "You can only have one."

"To hell you can. I have three." James persists.

There was a long pause before Remus spoke again.

"It doesn't feel that way."

James looked down ashamed. He'd never wanted the others to feel left out. He cared about Remus just as much as Sirius. He swore it.

"I'm not going to talk to him. Not until you forgive him at least." James speaks breaking the silence.

Remus gave him a look of pity before walking on.

Y/n's pov:

I walked in my room not expecting Sirius to be there. He usually was gone. Taking walks, he'd said, helped him clear his thoughts.

Yet here he was, leaning up against his bed frame. He had a cigarette in his mouth, blowing smoke all around the room. I wave my arm around the room trying to create fresh air.

He didn't acknowledge the fact that I walked in. I slid up against him. He still didn't look at me.

I hated cigarettes.

I pick up the box on the floor pulling a stick out. "How do you do it?" I ask him.

He turns to me arching his brow. "You've never smoked?"

I nod my head to a no.

"Stick it in ur mouth and breathe it in."

That was the only advice he gave. I had done what he said, immediately coughing.

I never picked up a cigarette for the rest of my life.

The tips of Sirius's lips and moved up slightly.

I hasn't seen him smile in a while. Even if this wasn't technically a smile, it was enough. Enough for me to have hope things would be okay again.

Sirius had kept on smoking, I had set my stick on the floor. "Do you reckon they'll ever forgive me?"

I sat in thought. I already knew what to say but I wanted him to know that I thought about it. That I actually meant it.

"Of course they will. They miss you."

Sirius puffs out a load of smoke.

He rests his head on my shoulder. My body tensed up against the sudden feeling.

"Thank you." He quietly says.

I wasn't entirely sure what I had done for him.

I grab his hand, intertwining it with mine and that was that.