Trapped inside a Thunderstorm

Precious jewellery

The first thing I did when I got back to my room was actually shooing out the doctor who was waiting for me. I hated these guys and there was nothing wrong with me at all. It was not my mind which was broken but this world itself. They all wanted to kill me. Not a single route wouldn't result in my death. No matter where I go, no matter where I look. I was always bound by my fate.

Me: *sigh*

It honestly was not easy to shoo that goddamn person out of my room but when I did succeed in doing that, I was finally all alone in my room again. 

As I thought....

They removed everything that could be used as a weapon.....

Too bad they didn't think about jewellery  at all. I had quite a lot an in there were some hairpins as well as hair ornament which should be sharp enough to actually hurt myself. It was better than nothing and maybe I would get lucky and could bleed out. That was at least what I would love to think but realistically speaking that may or may not take ages and perhapse someone would find me till then.

Oh well for now I was certainly gonna start off with just a jewellery and then see if I could cut myself with it. There was not much of another option. Bleeding out was the simpliest yet the slowest way. Drowning could also be an option if there would be a place where I could just decide to hop in. The bathtup was not really a place to drown with all the maids around and there was for sure not a chance that they would leave me alone in there.

Anyways, I quickly started looking around the room until I found something. It was not really sharp but if I would break it, then it could get sharp. There were a couple of objects which would be certainly enough to do the trick if broken but none were really good. It was not as if there was a mirror I could break or a vase. They had removed breakable things from this room.

However they did forget that even the sharpest hairpin can become a weapon as well as butterknife and other materials. Metal can bend and even if it was not ment to bend or break, with enough force everything was possible.

In my case, I found some hair pin and it had quite a huge gem placed as well. It was a cristal from some sort but I didn't care right now and threw it down to the ground. It shattered without much of a noise. The cristal itself glittered and looked just pretty on the ground.

It didn't take really long for me to take one and then try to cut open my wrist deep enough so that I could bleed out. Maybe the shard of this gem stone was not large but it was enough to actually cut the skin without any effort. 

I hope they can leave me alone!

I don't want anything to do with anyone.

They should all just leave me alone!

This world sucks!

Everything wants to kill me and I tried... I tried my best to actually go on and change the future but......

Why did Ecklis had to get back with Ivonne?

I.... I had a bit more time...

I just needed a bit more!

There was really nothing stopping me from getting him to actually confess.

I was soo close...

I..... I lost....

I simply lost.

While this was crossing my mind, I cut deeper and deeper into my skin not caring about any kind of scar or the consequences if someone would find me. Not only was it hard to focus since my mind was a in a pure state of disarray and chaos but I felt my cheeks burning again as tears started to form and fall down again. I really hated truly hated it. The blurry vision, the stuffy nose, the burning cheeks and the way it was starting to be hard to breath.

It hurt!

Living hurt!

It felt as if someone had just cut open my chest and took out my heart.

Someone had stolen me my life and everything important to me.

Was there a way out now?

I don't know but I slumbed on my kness and then slowly laid down on the ground to rest a bit more while I would hopefully bleed out in this room and become a ghost to haunt them all.