Trapped inside a Thunderstorm

Peace

Slowly without any kind of hurry, I started to make my way up to the tower towards the bell. My hopes were lost, my resolve was set. Nothing could stop me now. I was scared of the future. I was scared of my death but if I was destined to die, then at least I could die in a way that I chose. 

My whole life I tried to be accepted. I tried fitting in and I tried to do my best but apparently that was not enough.

Me: *sgh*

Was there anything I wished for?

No.

Was there anything I wanted to say?

No... I had no words.

Anything I wanted to do?

Besides resting and being in peace without this constant fear? .... No there was nothing at all.

So I continued my adventure up the stairs and towards the door which would finally open the hatch to the bells room. It was windy and it was a clear day for sure. People would soon find my body and yet I didn't care about this as I stepped to the room and got closer to the edge. It was beautiful standing here.

It was still dark but it was a matter of hours till the sun would rise and I would perish. Maybe this was how the future should have went. If I would go, then there wouldn't exist any fake daughter. No villain here, no danger and more importantly I would finally be at my peace without handling these lunatics.

Me: *sigh*

For some reasons sighing was all I could do as I was watching the time pass by. I was not impatient. I didn't care. Everything was lost and everything was decided. No one could tell me anything more at all. 

I feel soo much better now that the time will come soon....

What was I even thinking....

Escaping? Me? From what? Where?

People hate me since I am the mad dog!

No one treats me as a person but as a dog and even worse than a mutt.

I have no way to go!

I have no place to be!

I am on my own!

I don't want to hunger, to freeze, to be without any roof... I can't... 

The sunset was really beautiful and my mind was at ease as I started to stand there. One step, one leap and it would be all over. My mind was at a truly state of peace. It was weird and I knew it. It was wrong and shouldn't be but it was like this. Did I had a problem? Depends on how you see the world. For me, this was the only option out of a messed up world. For everyone else, I was THE problem.

As I was standing there, I started to see more and more people gathering there. They had spotted me and it seems as if I was the best show they could watch. I didn't care. Everything didn't matter. I had seen my sunrise and that was all I wanted.

Now finally without any regrets, I closed my eyes as a tear escapped and started rolling down my cheek.

Me: Hah... that it came to this....

It came to me, as weird as I was, I couldn't stop myself from laughing a bit before finally jumping. The air felt refreshing as it was rushing past me. I knew that it was just a couple of seconds until everything would be gone but these couple of seconds felt like an eternity for me. I was peaceful. I saw my tearsdropps falling and being in the air above me. I saw the sky and the bells tower rising, rushing past me. I was truly happy. No worries, no anxiety, no fear, no dread, no nothing. Emptiness was all I felt and once more I closed my eyes as it was finally about to end.

I am sorry.....

I am truly sorry....

I tried....

I know that there is no one who will be sad about this...

I know that I am on my own....

But I still hope that there will be just one person who would bring me a flower at my grave.

I don't need morning, I don't need love.... I just wish to have a propper burial as well as some nice flowers.

I waited and waited for the impact  while hearing screams going on. Did they really not think that I would do it? Oh how foolish of them as these people pushed me to do this. I had no escape and........

???: PENELOPE!!!