37 days: Holding on 2 broken promises

The reason you left

POV
Millie

I arrive at the office just after nine, I stopped at a resale shop on my way in.

It was a weird morning, I feel like Steph has been avoiding me. Women though, we do weird things when we're PMSing.

I brought in some small green plants, some landscape photos for the wall, and some cute pen holders. This should make the office look a little less...sad.

I set up some of the things, already significantly better in here. My phone dings on the dark wood desk. I retrieve it and it's Nick.

How's the decorating going? Everything pink already?

I chuckle at the message.

Me: Ha. Ha. No, I reconsidered last minute.

Nick: Thank you god

Me: How's the document signing going?

Nick: It's so much fun, equivalent to pink.

I laugh out loud.

Me: I'm really missing out then huh?

Nick: For sure. Would've been black coffee to me if you were here.

Oh shit..what do I even say to that?

Me: Sure..

Nick: Guess we'll never know will we?

Me: I guess not

Ugh, why does this feel so wrong? I mean it is..I'm flirting with my coworker but what feels even more wrong is that I feel bad that I'm flirting with someone that is not X.

I'm brought back to the memory of yesterday's encounter. He looked so sad and defeated but what was I supposed to do? I love the man, I don't want him to be hurt but he hurt me first and there are consequences to your actions.

Shit...what are the consequences going to be with Nick? He's an amazing guy and I think he likes me? I just don't want to get involved with anyone, I just don't want to get involved with anyone but X if I'm being honest with myself.

It's settled, single forever.

...

I make it back to the hotel around noon. I still have a lot of the day ahead of me with nothing to do.

Great.. alone with my thoughts.

Since I've been lacking sleep lately, I decide to take a nap before girls' night.

I, of course, cry myself to sleep before my nap.

...

I wake up and grab my phone from the nightstand, it's 2 pm.

I text Chase.

Me: Hey chase! Wanna meet up for coffee?

Chase: Yeah, sure! When?

Me: Whenever you have time

Chase: Okay wanna meet at Starbucks at 3? The one on Oceanfront Rd?

Me: Yeah see you then!

I freshen myself up, adding a few more curls to my hair since it flattened down from my nap, and touch up my makeup from the stream of tears.

I head out around 2:45 to meet up with Chase.

When I arrive at Starbucks, I walk inside and see Chase sitting at a table with his laptop in front of him.

"Hi, Chase!" I say with a smile.

"Millie, hey!" He says standing up to hug me.

I sit down across from him and he closes his laptop.

"How are you? How's the whole house thing going?" He asks.

"It's...not.." I say and he lifts an eyebrow.

"I'm staying at a hotel," I say embarrassed.

"Millie, what? Why didn't you tell me? You know you could've stayed with me again." He says all too fast.

Yeah...okay, not making that mistake again. Besides, X would probably kill him.

"Yeah I know, it's fine though. It's a nice hotel and Steph has been staying with me." I explain.

"Enough about me though, I'm totally fine, what's been going on with you? We haven't talked much since we saw Tate's band." I say remembering that night all too well. I mean it was only a week ago but it's the night X and I slept together.

Oh no, the thoughts flood my mind. What I would do just to sleep with him again. Stop it, Millie! Stop it!

"Yeah I know, well...I've kinda been hanging out with Jessie." He says shyly.

I smile, "who's Jessie..?" I ask.

He chuckles, "The singer from the band."

"Oh my god chase!" I say laughing, "Good for you!"

He smiles and shrugs his shoulders.

"How's it going with your guy? He's not here is here? Ready to swing?" He asks looking around.

I put my head down and shake my head, twiddling my fingers together, "no," I whisper.

"The reason you left?" He asks softly.

I nod my head with it still being down.

"I'm sorry, Millie." He says.

"It's okay, Chase, I'm fine," I say lying to him.