37 days: Holding on 2 broken promises

Forgotten

POV
Millie

I sit along the wall in the hotel hallway with Nick still out. At first, I was afraid X may have killed him with that punch but I see that he's breathing. It's going to be really awkward if another hotel guest comes waltzing down the hall. Luckily, this floor is a pretty quiet one.

Nick starts to move a little, I think he may be getting out of his unconscious state. He opens his eyes and sees me looking down at him.
He perks up and scoots away from me like I'm the devil himself.

"Where is he?!" he asks frightened looking around.

Gee, guess I could count on him to protect me if I needed it...

"He's gone, Nick," I say.

"Why didn't you tell me you were X's?!" He asks belittling me.

"I'm not his, he doesn't own me," I say annoyed.

"Sorry.." he says trying to recover himself.

I lean my head against the wall behind me, "sorry about all of this." I say not looking at him.

"It's not your fault Millie, X is..." he says trailing off.

"I know, you don't need to explain, since when do you call me Millie?" I ask looking over to meet his eyes.

He shrugs his shoulders.

"You know we're both going to need explanations on this, right?" I say.

I give him my rollercoaster of a story and he tells me his.

Apparently, Nick, who is actually Nico, worked for X a couple of years ago to pay for college. He grew up on and off the streets and had an opportunity to live at X's house while getting his life in order. He admitted to having a rough history there but didn't go into details. He's trying to stray away from his old life, sort of like me.

Nick lets out a loud exhale, "Millie look, I really do like you but I can't keep seeing you." He delivers the message with such ease.

"Yup..kinda figured that was coming.." I say.

If it weren't him to do it, it'd be me.

"I'm sorry, I wish you the best," he says standing up and walking away the same path did not long ago.

"You too," I say inaudible, putting my hand out in a wave with his back to me.

I put my head in my hand, "why me?" I ask myself with an exhale.

I get myself up off the ground and unlock the door to my hotel room letting myself in. Steph isn't here yet, I really need to vent to her.

I walk over to the couch, lying down on it, and covering my face with my hands, I'm filled with stress from the last 35 days.

I don't know what to do about X, of course, I want him more than anything but can I trust him? Can he even trust me anymore? The door is open for me if I want him.

I think back to the episode of The Bachelor, 35 days ago every girl wanted X, I mean they still do of course but I'm the one, I'm the winner in all this. I've done my fair share of mess ups too and at the end of the day, he still wants me just as much as he did the day before. Tomorrow, and the next day, and the next I'll still be the one he chooses without the what-ifs.

But what if the winner of the show, or me in this scenario is the one questioning everything?

I lay uncovering my eyes and looking towards the ceiling contemplating my thoughts and feelings about X, about the future or no future at all. What if I give him another chance and what if I don't? Will I regret one or the other?

I stand up going to the bedroom, I pull open the bedside drawer taking the cocktail napkins X wrote out for me the other night.

Oh my god, I completely forgot the envelope of 20 answers! This week has been insanity for me it completely slipped my mind.

I turn the envelope over and slowly open it while sitting myself down on the bed next to me.

"Okay X, let's see what you want me to know."