Glimpse Of Us | JEGULUS

6 | my radiant beam in the night

"Regulus?" James asked cautiously, tossing his blanket to the side. He had been awoken by a shout, or at least he had thought there was a shout. He frowned as he looked toward the boy's bed, "Are you awake?"

The boy remained silent and James got out of bed when Regulus began muttering something to himself. James immediately ran over, touching the boy on the arm as he thrashed in the bed, "Regulus, hey." He waited a beat before trying again, "Reg, wake up."

He shot up with a shout and James pulled the boy towards himself, Regulus latched onto his arms, a crazed look in his eyes. "Hey, woah, you're okay," James said as he moved his hand to Regulus's face, "You're awake, okay? Whatever it was, it's not real." Regulus shook his head and James pulled him closer, "It wasn't real. You're safe."

James wasn't entirely sure why he was doing this. Yes, he was familiar with this behavior and he sort of knew what to do to help, but he knew that Regulus would rather be left alone. And yet, here he was. James always did things even when he knew he was better off letting it be.

Regulus rested his head against James's chest and James wrapped his arms around the boy. James was surprised that he was even being allowed to do this. It was shocking, really. Sirius practically threw a tantrum the first time James did his best to help him back in first year.

Then again, he was eleven years old.

James moved so that they were both on the bed more comfortably. He remained sitting on the bed, his back against the headboard and Regulus had his arms wrapped around James's waist. When James tried to move, Regulus's grip tightened so he stayed.

James looked down at the boy, running his fingers through the boy's hair. "Fais de beaux rêves," he muttered and Regulus's expression softened at this. Sweet dreams. Once his breathing leveled out, James smiled at the boy.

The two had returned to the regular routine rather easily. James hadn't actually responded to Regulus's "proposition" so Regulus took it as a pass. But the conversations were lighter and easier and there was far less tension between the two.

But they only really had until tomorrow before things went back to normal. Or as close to normal as James could muster.

One more day of Regulus just being Regulus before he went back to being Regulus Black, son of the Wizarding World's darkest and most infamous pureblood family.

It wasn't enough time.

Regulus woke up to James's arms wrapped around his torso, their legs tucked into each other as though they were always meant to be that way. He stayed that way for a bit, his sight on the empty bed next to him.

He remembered some of what happened earlier. He never quite remembers the dream but he always remembers the paralyzing fear that fills him when he wakes up. Normally Sirius was there, and he somehow knew how to make him feel better.

And he also didn't know why he hadn't shoved James off either. It would have been the smart and logical thing to do given the very complicated extenuating circumstances that the pair had yet to talk about. Hopefully they wouldn't have to, and they could go back to normal once this camp was finished.

Which was tomorrow.

He had less than a day with James before he went back to being James Potter. Blood traitor and scum child of two cowards, as his mother always says. The reason Sirius left him. Well, left his family.

And for whatever reason, it didn't feel like enough time.

Regulus turned over and James didn't move but his eyes opened after a moment. Regulus was watching him with furrowed eyes and James was tempted to pull away but didn't, leaving the choice to Regulus.

"Good morning," James muttered and Regulus merely kept staring, both amusing and confusing the other boy. "Everything alright?"

"I have a question."

"Okay..."

"Last night," he began and James swallowed, "You helped me. I mean, you knew how to help me. Did Sirius tell you? Because I-"

"Woah," James said, moving his arm to scratch the side of his head. Sirius was always quiet, using as few words to speak. He wasn't expecting Regulus to be so vocal, "No, he didn't say anything. He doesn't really like to talk about much if he can avoid it."

His lips curved downward, in thought in confusion. He waited a moment before he asked, "Then how did you know?"

James frowned, "Know what?"

"How to do that," he said. "How to calm me down? Because only Sirius-"

"Reg," James cut him off, fully expecting another ramble. "When I first met Sirius back in first year, he had the same problem. The night terrors? Sleep paralysis? All of it. I did research and I helped him. He never mentioned that you were going through the same. We barely even talked about the fact that he had those issues."

"Oh." Regulus glanced down for a moment before looking up again. "Well, um, thank you." James grinned at this, confusing the boy greatly, "What?"

"Did you just say 'um'?" James asked, his smile unwavering. "And did you just thank me?"

"Oh, shut up," Regulus huffed, rolling over so they weren't as close anymore. "I take it back." He sat up on the bed and James was quick to get up as well.

"No, no, it's just - hmm - I don't think I've ever heard you stutter before," James explained as he circled the bed to come face to face with a rather grumpy looking Regulus. "And I always assumed gratitude was beneath you."

Regulus scowled, "What is that supposed to mean?"

"No, it's not a bad thing!" he exclaimed. "I thought it was cute, actually, but-"

"You thought it was cute?"

He hesitated, "Yes?"

"You are a very confusing person, James Potter."

James looked at the boy incredulously, "Me? I'm the confusing one?" He shook his head in disbelief, "You are nothing like I thought you'd be and you're calling me confusing?"

Regulus stood up, so that he was now looking down at him, "Yes, you. One second you're being a complete ass to me and the next second you're seducing me and-"

"Hold it, you kissed me," James countered, pointing at the boy. "I'd say it was the other way around."

"Oh, please," he scoffed. "You had been making comments all week and I saw you looking when you thought I didn't know."

"Okay, fine," James huffed. "Maybe I didn't discourage you but you still kissed me first. And last I checked, only one of us was experienced."

Regulus narrowed his eyes, "I asked you if it was-"

"Regulus," James shook his head and the boy miraculously stopped talking. "Just shut up and kiss me, would you?"

The two stood there for a moment, the tension between them was palpable. Regulus moved first, his hand moving to James's neck and pulling him closer, "This is the last time."

"Yes, of course," James said breathily, "Whatever you want, my love."

Regulus pushed the boy down and James looked up at him, "Salazar, you're insufferable, you know that?"

"No, I didn't," he tsked, a faint smirk taking over his lips, "You should tell me again, just so I remember."

Regulus rolled his eyes before leaning in for a kiss, James pulled the boy closer, his legs spread so that he fit between. James pulled away for the briefest moment, his thumb brushing across his cheek, "You're beautiful. Absolutely breathtaking." Regulus leaned into his touch. "Regulus, what do you want? Even if it's just for today."

"You, Jamie," he whispered in response, his sight flickered across James's face, like he was trying to memorize every nook and cranny, "All I want is you."