Fix You

Extra

Chan sat at the end of that table, he tried to put on a show for the people around him. It was just his third week back in his hometown and away from his precious small town.

He wants to go back so badly.

He's been put through hell since he has been back, from having them put him as an intern, an actual fucking intern, in his mother's company.

To finding out that the man he has loved for what seems like forever is getting married.

He knew it would happen, Chan knew that it was only a matter of time before that happened.

Minho and Jisung were high school sweethearts, the: 'it couple'.

It always broke Chan a bit more when he saw them together, yet he had made up his mind.

He wanted to come back and make things right, to help out his mother like she had requested so many times.

Now he was there and he had to witness, once again, Minho being happy and in love with that kid.

Chan had to swallow his pain and smile through it all.

The pain in his chest grew bigger and bigger from that moment forward.

Then the ugliest moment came, having to go to that forsaken dinner.

The place looked like something out of a magazine. Chan knew it wasn't much of Minho's taste, probably more Jisung's.

And then, there he was, the love of his life.

Minho standing at the front of the door with a dazzling smile and those sweet eyes, his suit looking all pressed and good.

Chan wanted to die... or throw up.

But all he did was smile big at the younger man and present his champagne, which his mother had suggested he bring.

Truly, Chan doesn't even remember what he said to Minho at that moment. All he remembers is his beautiful face, his hair falling onto his forehead making Minho look like a prince.

He recalls only saying he was a scream away, he recalls Minho looking tired once he was closer, and he recalls wanting to pull him into his arms and beg him not to do it.

Then he walked like a robot to sit, next to someone he didn't even know. Chan looked around, he tried to hide the hurt, and the pain with a cold mask because that always worked.

This time it didn't.

It felt like he was being choked and all he could do was sit still and take it. He wanted to run out, but only did the next best thing and ran to the bathroom.

"It's okay," he said as he looked at his reflection in the mirror after throwing cold water on his face "You will finally take a bit step in mom's company, soon I'll be sitting next to....." he couldn't even say his name.

All Chan could do was swallow his pain and sadness, he couldn't run away, not anymore at least. He had to be fake about it all. He had to push through it all and fake his niceties.

"I can do it," he whispered as he took a deep breath "He's happy, he's loved, and he doesn't need me..." it was supposed to calm him down, but it only made him want to scream, and cry.

"As long as he's happy, so am I"

*

Chan closes his eyes as he tries to erase that memory, it was the last moment he had of knowing Jisung and Minho would be together forever.