anxiety

C12: Your All I Need

>>dyyyylllll
once Eleanor, Breanna, and Sophia had chugged five down each. they were sober, after we drew a chalk line outside and they walked it. it was my turn, and it took the first bottle. the cap, already torn off, was in bent in half in my hand. my eyes flickered around to all of them. Luke was smiling insanely. Breanna groaned and raced before me. and tilted the bottle into my mouth. I gagged at the taste. my mouth chugged it down, but i started to feel it come up. I took the bottle away from my mouth. but Breanna put it back in my mouth.

"drink. it. all." she growled.

I shook my head, tears streaming down. Michael and Luke realized I couldn't take anymore so they pushed Breanna off me, and took the bottle out of my mouth. I began to shake profusely. I ran for the bathroom upstairs, and threw up in the toilet. I felt heat rush up against my face and kiss it red. someone's cold hand touched my revealing back and spine. another grasped my hair, putting a hand on my head.

"let it out, just let it out." somebody soothes. I cried while throwing up, because my throughly burned throat ached.

I glanced to see Sophia, Eleanor, Luke and Michael. Sophia held alcohol wipes, Eleanor held my hair, and Luke sat on his calves rubbing my back. Michael was holding something in his hands, it wasn't clear to my vision.

"l-l-look, I-I ch-ch-chi-chickened o-o-out. I- I- I a-am s-so-sorry." I hiccuped.

"oh no, honey. it's okay. you spoke up during dodge ball, and we didn't listen. we're sorry. Breanna kind of became aggressive about how you refused to drink after each of us." Sophia said kneeling down to my level. I gasped for a moment in pain. Luke wrapped his arm around me, a kissed my back.

"you're not in trouble, Bre is. she is going to go to hell for what she did. we all, except Bre and ash, know about Eleanor and her video. she is not right. at all." Luke whispered into my ear. I nodded smiling a bit.

I flushed the toilet and sat on the counter and leaned against the mirror. my back was cooling down against the cool surface, and Luke was leaning up against the door. Eleanor sat on the floor, Sophia sat on the bathtub's edge, and Michael had handed me a wet, freezing towel. Michael was sitting in the corner, all of us squeezed into on bathroom for two. declaring independence, I walked out with a wet rag on my neck, and sweat clinging to my forehead, and an alcohol wipe under my nose.

"listen here, blonde. your actions have gotten each of us in trouble. me, to become more angry, anxious- most importantly insecure. It sounds like a fake but it ain't. you have mistakened a sixteen year old girl for a trouble maker. I am special to my dad and mom. I am not going to put up with your stupid fat shaming! I try to become my weight. I try to fit in. I try to make people laugh. I try, I try, i tried so dang hard to be your friend! and what did you do!? didn't get to know me. so go jump into a pit of feathers, glue covering your body. now." I growled angrily staring Breanna in the eyes.

"since when do I fat shame? I am not doing anything to you. I thought we were friends!" Breanna said [fake] tearing up. "you're so mean! Luke made a mistake!"

Ashton wrapped his arms around her, scowling at me. "she didn't do a thing, what the hell is wrong with you?" he screamed. through the bleach curls of the model, I saw a smile plaster on her face. she winked at me, and began to cry harder.

"Ashton, I haven't known you long but I know more about you than she does! I looked up your band! I took my time, staying up to meet you guys! I am so agrivated you aren't seeing throw her little white lies! I know your favorite food is spaghetti! your little sisters name is Lauren, your brothers is Harry. Harry is the youngest. Lauren is the middle. your nick name is Poss, from your mum. because you have possum's eyes, they're big and brown. I stayed up to know everything about you guys so I don't make a mistake in the future." I yelled.