The Best Mistakes

24. Kayra

I had decided to do everything I couldn't do in the past. The mistakes I avoided I vowed to make them all but from the ones I already made and which I was going to, sleeping with Nolan fucking Gray was the worst of them all. Out of all my bad choices and bad decisions in my life, this one takes the cake.

In the whole taxi ride, I tried to come up with different ideas to avoid Nolan for the rest of my life and excuses to give to my friends but I completely forgot what to say when I got home. And it hit me right when I heard two ear splitting shrills.

Amy touched the purple bruises on my neck and collarbone which I didn't know were there. I realized that I came home covered in hickeys and everyone saw them. Why doesn't this ground split and swallow me whole? God, it's embarrassing!

Ruby eyed me from top to bottom with a suppressed grin. Well, why won't she? I was looking like a mess, rumpled dress, purple marks on my neck, smudged make-up, messy hair. Everything about my current state screamed, 'I had sex.'  and not to mention a wonderful one at that.

"Spill. Down to every detail," Ruby said it but Amy was the one whose face flushed red. She nudged Ruby with her elbow lightly. "Not every detail. Just the overview."

It didn't matter if it's detailed or just an overview, because even if I had this long spiciest night to tell, I won't. I didn't exactly regret doing it with Nolan but I was not proud of it either. So, it's better to keep this under wraps or in this scenario under the sheets.

"Can I go wash up real quick? I am exhausted." I released my arm from their grip and hurriedly went off to the bathroom before they could catch me.

They laughed as soon as I shut the door. “Of course you are.”

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

After a long (for me) and quick (for them) briefing on last night when I lost my virginity to my supposed date, the girls finally gave up. But an unsatisfied expression lingered on their faces when I refused to share the 'How good it was' part. I just nodded when they asked if it was good, bad or mind-blowing. My face flushed when the blurry images from yesterday played infront of my eyes. My face answered their questions.

Ruby grinned, patting me on my back, "I am proud of you, Kayra. You got railed for the first time and it was fucking good. What more do we want?"

"We gotta celebrate," Amy squealed as if we weren't celebrating before. Two Large half-finished bowls of popcorn, a whole pizza and several cans of beer just for the story of 'how I lost my virginity.' What more did you want for celebration?

The doorbell rang. "Just on time." Ruby ran excitedly towards the door and within a few minutes came back with a box in her hands. She took out a simple cake from inside and placed it in front of me. 

My brows raised seeing that cake. "How long were you waiting to order this cake?" A simple white buttercream cake on which 'congrats on getting fucked' was written and a dick was drawn in bold red. She should have bought this one before, when life started fucking me, raw.

"I'd rather not say." She handed over the knife to me. I wish I could stab myself with it because the post-sex-humiliation was killing me. I hate that man yet I still begged him for more while moaning his damn name and I'm fucking celebrating it. Screw me!

"Don't you dare." I glared at Ruby when she attempted to feed me the dick part of the cake. "Oh, you don't want another dick now that you've found the one," she mocked. As if.

I left the hotel without telling Nolan. I wasn't ready to face him in case he was already awake. I was in utter gratitude when I found him sleeping. His sleeping face was adorable, like a little sleeping hamster. I couldn't believe he could look so sweet and lovable. When I saw his dry lips and a small wound on his lower lip, the urge to touch them came over me. I wanted to taste them again and see if they were as sweet as yesterday. But I just couldn't do it, it was easy yesterday but it felt bone-crushingly hard now. The reason was simple, everything happened in the heat of the moment and when the heat dissipated, it was hard to reason everything that happened. I was blaming my frustration and anger towards him for my actions. He had to take responsibility for ruining my dates and he did, so what was the problem? I was sure it wasn't even a big deal for him. One-night-stands were normal for him.

But why was this knowledge upsetting me? He should be awake by now, then why wasn't there a call, hell, not a single text from him. I sighed looking at my phone. At the same time, Ruby sighed as well looking at her phone. Her earlier demeanor had changed from jolly to dejected. She looked down for some reason. "You okay?"

She put down her phone and passed me a warm smile. “Of course, I'm okay. What will happen to me?” But she was not okay, anyone could tell. She was hiding something but I didn't want to pester her more since she'll share when she wants.

I nodded. “Okay.”