S7VEN (La Familia Kingpin Series #1)

58. Carte Blanche

SANTY

THE NIGHT'S pitch black just hours before dawn. That blanket statement is timely now, both for what I'm thinking and experiencing.

Marahan kong pinaraan ng daliri ang malamig na posas sa pulsuhan ko saka nilingon ang asawang ngayon ay tahimik na nakatayo sa tapat ko.

His face was void but I could hear his thoughts clearly. It echoed mine. Nervous, messy. All over the place.

"P-pardon? You w-what?"

Seven heaved a long sigh. Tumingala ito't marahang pinaraanan ng mga daliri ang buhok. Nagsalubong ang makakapal nitong kilay, tila hinahabi sa utak ang bawat salitang bibigkasin. Ayun at ang kanina pang madilim na mukha nito ang lalong nagpakabog sa dibdib ko.

Though he's freshly shaven now compared to yesterday when I first saw him after that long slumber, I could tell that my husband's at war with his thoughts and everything. Even to me. And that's what boggles me.

"You can ask me anything, Santy."

"Anything?"

"Yes."

Sinalubong nito ang nagtatanong kong mga tingin saka marahang humarap sa bintana. Namulsa ito't tila walang sinuman ang makaka arok sa layo ng tingin niya't sa lalim ng iniisip. Call it instict but my time with Seven made me attuned to his thoughts and body language.

"You're afraid," it's a statement. The only response I got from him is a quiet hum.

I've had enough.Tumayo ako't inalis ang posas sa pulsuhan ko't inilapag iyon sa ibabaw ng kama. I took tentative steps towards him. Stretching my arms, I softly touch his muscled forearm that's peeking on his gray shirt.

"Can I ask why?"

"Not why. Who."

"Seven.. stop talking in riddles," frustrated na giit ko sa asawa. Nahimigan nito marahil ang inis ko kaya't nilingon ako. Mapait na ngiti ang nakapinta sa mga labi nito.

"By you, angel. I dodged bullets and escaped death countless times. Yet, here I am trembling. Now more than ever, I am afraid of the who. Santy...after this, you might w-want to– leave me."

"Then don't."

Pagak itong natawa't muling ibinaling ang mga mata sa labas ng bintana.

"Imposible ang hinihingi mo."

A powerful fist clenched my heart because of the insecurity in Seven's tone. I shake my head to ease myself from that unbearable pain, silently chastising myself 'cause the action made me a bit woozy. I gripped Seven's forearm, annoyed by his demeanor and for some balance.

"I'm not asking you to lie to me. You promised, remember? No more lies,"pilit ko siyang pinihit sa gawi ko't sinapo ang magkabila niyang pisngi. His five o'clock scratched my palms and I need to bite the inside of my cheeks to shoo the wayward thoughts it stirs inside me. My body is also at war with my mind, it appears so.

"Si. No more lies," he leaned on my hand and kissed the inside of it.

"I want to know everything, Seven. I demand it. What I'm asking from you is that hold me. Especially now. For as long as you can take."

Nag angat ng mukha si Seven. Maybe it's the finality of my words coupled with the threat that's hidden behind them, tumalim ang mga mata nito. I gulped, naalala kong bigla ang anyo ng asawa noong gabing iligtas nila ako mula sa kamay ni Antoni. The sheer brutality in those dark orbs made me shiver. This is the Seven I knew and more. It's as if the devil has resurrected to torture and punish everyone in its wake, reasons are damned.