S7VEN (La Familia Kingpin Series #1)

46. Omerta - An Oath

SEVEN

MY LIFE NOW FALLS INTO A ROUTINE. A pattern that I wouldn't mind doing over and over again. I'll wake up with a stupid smile on my lips knowing that there's a beautiful angel on my side. A loving creature who willingly cut off her wings left heaven and chose to be with me.

Days filled with sunshine and sweet kisses. Nights full of scorching love-making and dirty promises scribbled at my backs, clawing their way to my veins, joining my blood until it conquered every part of me. The next thing I knew, it was in the middle of my chest sitting like a queen.

Santy. She is my queen.

It's perfect. Was being the massive operative word. I should have been more careful. Cherish and protect that love. But I consumed her, burn her soul, and crushed her heart. Guess that made me the biggest monster who has a first-class ticket in hell.

The enormity of my actions, of what I've said earlier, hit me like a freaking train after she slammed the door on my face. And it strikes where it is more painful. Home.

"Shit!" I muttered under my breath when I saw the dried tears stain her cheeks.

Seeing her like this, defeated and lonely even in her sleep is equivalent to dying. I want to stop it, make it better for her. Gusto kong punasan iyon, kiss the trail and whisper soothing words to take all the pain. Owned every bit of it because I do. Everything about her belongs to me. Saya, lungkot o luha. I want to promise her anything even though I'm still in a haze with the news she dropped earlier. The word is alien to me—father.

I'm pregnant.

Muli ko na namang narinig ang mga katagang iyon at kung paanong nagalit si Santy matapos malaman ang reaksiyon ko. Pero anong gusto n'yang marinig mula sa 'kin? I'm an asshole who doesn't even have the patience for wailing kids much less change a freaking diaper. Then bigla, boom! Siete, tatay ka na.

Fuck.

Mas gugustuhin ko pa yatang ipatapon sa gitna ng gubat o giyera sa Afghanistan kaysa magbantay ng maliit na tsanak na mumurahin lang din ako paglaki. Shit. King ina. Kinulang ba ng cast ang Wow Mali, at pati ako napag tripan? Or this is one of Onze's sick prank?

Shaking my head, I silently laugh. Mirthless.

How will I tell her that this is too much for me? That her presence alone overwhelms me tapos ngayon... Inis na nasabunutan ko ang buhok at nahahapong naupo sa paanan ng kama. Men in general aren't allowed to show weakness pero heto ako ngayon, lider ng isang makapangyarihang organisasyon, on my kness, tulala.

I'm having a whiplash of emotion. Isa lang naman ang tinatakbo ng gago kong utak, I'm not yet ready to be a father. Mentally and emotionally. I don't want to share her, yet. Madami pa akong plano for us and adding a little monster in the equation will mess that up.

Heaving a sigh, I gently massage my nape. This looming war with the Enterprise took up all my energy and patience at 'di iyon alam ni Santy. I've been dealing with filthy people who'll be happy to know that now I have two weaknesses that they can exploit now.

I swallowed the bile in my throat when a picture of Santy invaded my mind. Freaking out and worst running away from me. I know she would once na malaman n'ya kung sino at ano ang tunay na ako. I only gave her bread crumbs and not the whole bakery of secrets.

Damn it! Ba't ba patong-patong na lahat ng problema ko?

Nang biglang umungot si Santy at gumalaw, tumambad sa 'kin ang mga hita nito. I forced myself to swallow the desire that's always present for her. I stand up, grabbed the comforter, and gently tucked her in.