𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬. [𝗛𝘆𝘂𝗻𝗹𝗶𝘅 𝗙𝗙]

𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 32

🖍️  This chapter contains mature themes, including discussions of past trauma, homophobia, emotional distress, slight smut, and explicit language.
Reader discretion is advised.  🖍️

Hyunjin's POV :-

As we sat together in the dimly lit room, illuminated only by the soft glow of a single lamp and the gentle light of the moon filtering in through the window, I couldn't help but feel a sense of anticipation mingled with uncertainty. The atmosphere was heavy with unspoken words and unresolved emotions, yet there was also a glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, this conversation would bring us the closure we both desperately needed.

I took a deep breath, gathering my thoughts. It was time to confront the past, to unravel the tangled threads and find the answers, no matter how painful or difficult they might be.

We sat on the floor, leaning against the wall for support, the warmth of his body beside mine was comforting. Our legs touched, a silent reassurance of our shared presence. Before us lay a few empty and full bottles. We had half-empty bottles in our hands, taking sips occasionally.

With a half-smile playing on my lips, I raised the bottle to my lips, taking another sip of the whiskey. "What's your first question?" I inquired, the words slipping effortlessly from my tongue.

He took a moment, then sighed deeply before asking, "What did I do in the past that made you hate me?"

Before I could say anything he continued, "Isn't that the reason everything started? You hated me so much that you were ready to play the friend role and then hurt me but in the end, even when your intentions and feelings changed that's exactly what
happened,"

As I lifted my eyes to meet his, I noticed a shift in his gaze. It held a vulnerability and openness that I hadn't seen before. Gone was the usual facade, replaced by a raw honesty that stirred something within me.

"I didn't hate you, Lix," I confessed, the weight of my words hanging heavy in the air. "I thought I did, but that isn't true. It was more like jealousy. My life revolved around making my parents proud, but they never seemed to acknowledge my efforts. Instead, they were always too busy comparing me to you or Yuna."

I took a moment to gather my thoughts, the memories of those years flooding back. "I'm not trying to justify my actions because what I did was wrong, but at that time, I was just a 16-year-old kid overwhelmed by insecurities. I thought that if I could get close to you, maybe distract you or make you feel the same hurt I faced every day, I might finally earn the recognition I craved."

"But when you left, and I finally had the spotlight to myself, I realized that even that wasn't enough to make my parents happy. And in the process, I lost the most important person in my life – you," I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper as I laid bare my deepest regrets.

"I still regret every moment," I confessed, the admission heavy on my tongue. "As I've said before, I'm still ready to do anything to make it up to you, Felix... because in the present, all I know is that I love you."

His gaze faltered, drifting downward as he spoke softly, his voice tinged with sorrow. "I apologize for beginning with this heavy topic... It's just that this question has haunted me since the day you walked out of that classroom, and Kevin revealed your true intentions," he confessed, his words punctuated by a soft sob.

"I defended you every day, convinced that Kevin was lying because I couldn't bear to believe that you, my Hyunjin, would ever have such intentions. But his relentless repetition of the accusation wore me down, and I began to doubt myself."

As I drew closer to him, setting aside my bottle, I gently cradled his face in my hands, brushing away his tears. "I don't want my words to be apologies anymore; I want my actions to speak louder," I whispered, my voice trembling.